tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55718161533364732382024-03-13T22:32:47.548-07:00The Art of TouchSee my website: www.angelstouches.com Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-20052981158746351622021-12-19T04:58:00.003-08:002021-12-20T18:41:54.081-08:00Old Wounds - Revisited #metoo As a child I attended a Christian church with my family. As I grew older I did question some of the specific teachings, practices and beliefs. However, overall, I believed that being a “Good Christian” meant being a “Good Person”; being kind, loving, accepting, patient and helpful to everyone I encountered and always trying to do the right thing… Just like the examples from the Bible of how Jesus treated all the people from various walks of life that he encountered with love and acceptance. I wanted to be like that. <div><br /></div><div>I also got the distinct message, from my parents and the church in general, that the church should be like an extension of the family… and that, for the most part, we should keep things within the family. Although we should be kind to “others” we should only trust members of our own faith. I was sent to Christian schools and encouraged to socialize with and eventually date only other Christians. My parents were not shy in expressing their strong preference that someday I should marry a nice Christian man who was a member of the same faith as we were. <div><br /></div><div>However, please let me clarify, this is not a story about the pros and cons of Religion or any particular Spiritual belief system. I am not about to launch into any kind of religious discussion or debate. I only am bringing up the church and my state of questioning to establish the context in which the events I’m about to share with you occurred. </div><div><br /></div><div>Although certain aspects of this story may sound a lot like it is yet another “ME TOO MOVEMENT” inspired story of sexual misconduct by an adult man in a position of power upon a young woman. However it is not my intention to “cancel” anyone, tarnish anyone’s reputation or cast blame, but perhaps to learn something of value. </div><div><br /></div><div>I have been carful not to mention any names. I share this story in hopes that we all can strive to be more compassionate in the way we treat one another. I share this in an effort to manifest healing, not only for myself but for the countless others out there who have experienced something similar. This is my story about my own personal experience of being deeply disappointed and hurt be someone I trusted, not once but twice. </div><div><br /></div><div>It all began when I was only about 18 or perhaps 19 years old. I had recently graduated from high school and I was just beginning my college life. My relationship with my high school sweetheart had come to an end. I was still feeling a bit heart broken over that breakup, but I had picked myself up, dusted myself off and was trying to navigate the dating scene once again. </div><div><br /></div><div>There was a man from my home church who was often in the role of leading programs for children and teens. He was a very popular charismatic camp leader who volunteered his time and energy a few weeks during the summers to bring fun activities to the kids at a church sponsored summer camp. He also led the teen Sabbath school class at my church. I believe he was in his early to mid thirties at the time. He was married to a very lovely young woman, and had two young children. </div><div><br /></div><div>Naturally I was happy and a bit flattered when he seemed to take me under his wing. He told me he believed I had leadership potential. He encouraged me to get more involved in planning activities for the youth division of our church. </div><div><br /></div><div>We did start spending a bit more time together, but it was all totally innocent; talking, mostly about planning potential youth activities. However I did confide in him once about some boyfriend troubles I was having. I thought that as an older man who had recently navigated all this dating stuff and apparently successfully managed to get through it all, got married and start a family, he might have some useful advice and wisdom to pass on to me. He did seem to be sympathetic, and told me that he thought the guy was being an idiot… which of course I appreciated. </div><div><br /></div><div>When one day he suggested we meet up at a restaurant, I genuinely assumed it was to discuss church youth activities. Perhaps that was very naive of me, But I was still just a young inexperienced teenager! As it turns out, he had something else in mind. </div><div><br /></div><div>He began the conversation by singing my praises, complimenting me, and talking about all the qualities about me that he found so appealing and attractive. He talked about how foolish the young man, that I was interested in at the time, was for not seeing how extraordinary I was, and for not treating me better. He also mentioned that he knew how to treat a woman right. When he leaned in close to me, like he was about to kiss me, I put it together that he was trying to make a case for why HE would make a better boyfriend / lover for me than any of these immature idiotic young guys I had been trying to date.</div><div><br /></div><div>Before anything really happened I pulled away. I was genuinely startled! I don’t remember my exact words, but I remember that I said NO! I turned down his advances very abruptly… without any hesitation. I noticed that he seemed to be quite surprised… and then really angry that I had turned him down. He looked at me like he couldn’t believe it. When he asked me why I agreed to meet with him, I told him that I thought we were meeting to talk about my role in youth leadership for the church. </div><div><br /></div><div>He laughed at me, with one of those sarcastic laughs, like he suddenly realized I was a stupid child, or thought perhaps I was joking. I stated a bit more forcefully this time, that I really didn’t realize that he had any romantic interest in me. I also told him that I had no interest in dating him… I pointed out that he was not only much older than me, but that he was a married man… with young children… and that I had no interest in dating a married man! </div><div><br /></div><div>His whole demeanor and tone suddenly changed, as if I had tricked him. He started to, very loudly, say all kinds of mean hurtful things to me, accusing me of being a TEASE! He insinuated that I was the one who started this by flirting with him. He yelled at me that I wasn’t so innocent, that I HAD to have known why he invited me to meet him at that restaurant. </div><div><br /></div><div>His words stung… and I felt suddenly terrified when I saw the fire in his eyes. I also felt embarrassed and stupid for not recognizing what was happening sooner, before I had agreed to meet with him. I had a flood of emotions at the time; including deep disappointment, hurt, disgusted, anger, shame, humiliation, horror… However, thankfully I kept calm and did what I believe was the right thing to do in that moment. I got up and walked away from him. I got into my car, heart pounding in my chest and drove away. </div><div><br /></div><div>I never spoke to that man again. I never returned to that church either… and eventually I decided that I didn’t want to be a member of any such church. I knew I felt betrayed that a man who was supposed to be a leader in the church, that I trusted and looked up to, had tried to engage me in something that was clearly wrong by any standards, and most definitely would be considered a “sin” by God and the church! </div><div><br /></div><div>I didn’t fully understand why this felt so much worse than times I had turning down unwanted sexual advance from someone my own age, until perhaps years later when I recognize the power differential. All I knew at the time was that I had looked up to him for advice and guidance as an elder of the church. I thought he saw my potential and wanted to help me, to mentor me. I thought our friendship was all aboveboard. But all that was crushed in an instant, and it left me feeling so dirty, so confused and insignificant when he turned our connection into something he tried to sexualize. </div><div><br /></div><div>I really didn’t believe this incident of him coming on to me, was actually my fault, but some of his words did get in to my head a little bit. I wondered, had I enjoyed his attention too much? Had I laughed at his jokes a bit to often? Had I sat to close to him when we talked? Had I unknowingly flirted with him… or led him on in some way? Was any small part of this my fault? But I know full well now… no… it was not. </div><div><br /></div><div>I didn’t tell anyone what had happened for awhile. I told myself it was because I didn’t think it was anyone’s business. I felt like it was perhaps all a stupid embarrassing “misunderstanding”. I would tell myself, something could have happened, but thankfully nothing really did “happen” because I handled it! No big deal. However, in the back of my mind I knew I didn’t tell anyone because I didn’t think anyone would believe me. If I told my story, he would deny it. I know he was well respected man in the church and I was just a teenager… and female. Even at that young age I understood that women weren’t often taken as seriously as men. </div><div><br /></div><div>I eventually shared my story with two people that I thought I could trust. One was a young man who I originally met through the church. He had stopped attending church long before I stopped going. However, I knew he would know who the person I was talking about was. I was encouraged because it was clear that he believed me right away, and he assured me it wasn’t my fault or me who brought this on. He told me that he knew of a couple of other young women / teenagers that this same man had made sexual advances to. One of these young women was the sister of the young man I had shared this story with. </div><div><br /></div><div>A couple years later I told one more person. I ran into my old high school sweetheart and we struck up a conversation. We spent quite a bit of time catching up and hanging out that day. It seemed a little like old times, and as we spoke our conversation got a bit deeper and more serious. I’m not sure how the conversation came around to this particular topic, but we seemed to be opening up to one another about many things, and for some reason I thought it would be safe to open up about this particular experience, so I shared with him what had happened to me with this man from my church. But his reaction was not what I had expected. </div><div><br /></div><div>I knew that he knew who this man was, but I had kind of forgotten that he really looked up to this man. He was apparently a hero of his, his favorite camp counselor from way back to the days he worked at summer camp. He seemed very surprised that someone he admired would do such a horrible thing. He expressed shock, dismay and a bit of reluctance to believe this man could have done such a thing. But in the end, I trusted that he would believe me, because I was speaking the truth. I know it’s sometimes very hard to take when our heroes fall from Grace and turn out to be less than ideal humans. But In spite of all that, I had no reason to lie to him. I thought this guy, my old high school sweetheart, would know I was telling the truth, because we knew and loved each other once. Well, I was wrong about that.</div><div><br /></div><div>I thought he might actually empathize with my experience because this man from church had been someone I admired once as well. I thought he might understand how devastating it was to me… that perhaps he could put himself in my place. Because this man was someone we both once thought so highly of, and looked up to. Yet he betrayed my trust. I thought he was mentoring me to be a youth leader, and suddenly he suggested that we have an affair. But apparently my old sweetheart, just couldn’t allow himself to believe me. </div><div><br /></div><div>Sadly his feelings of hero worship of this man seemed stronger than his feelings of trust and empathy for his old high school flame. He got kinda quiet and I wasn’t really sure what he was thinking… He never really said anything comforting or acknowledged my pain… we just dropped the subject and went our separate ways after that. </div><div><br /></div><div>Many years went by and I had nearly forgotten all about it, and the fact that I had shared the details of this humiliating experience with my ex… until I went to my 30 year class reunion. Remarkably it was a great turn out, and many of our classmates were there. My high school sweetheart was among those who turned out. </div><div><br /></div><div>For the most part everyone was behaving nicely, at least in the beginning. We tried to steer away from political discussions, and made it through most of the weekend politely avoiding any conflict around the hot topics of the time… until one evening when everything was winding down. It was the last night before heading home and many of us were informally gathered at the home of one of our classmates. He lived fairly near our old school. </div><div><br /></div><div>A discussion about a Supreme Court justice candidate who had been accused of sexual misconduct came up. Someone said they thought the women who accused him of raping her back in college, was lying. I expressed my opinion that I didn’t believe she was lying, and proceeds to explain why I believed her. Then in a horrifying moment the man who was once my high school sweetheart spoke up. He said something to the effect that sometimes women lie about stuff like that, possibly for attention or some other devious motive… then he proceeded to tell MY STORY, the one I had shared with him in confidence all those years ago. However he offered it up as an example of a woman lying, making up a story about a man making unwanted sexual advances! </div><div><br /></div><div>I was shocked, mortified and most of all I felt betrayed. This man who I had once loved, and shared something deeply personal with, in confidence, not only shared my story without my permission, embarrassing me in front of all our classmates by telling a very private story about me, but he actually accused me of lying! All I could do was to say yes, I did tell you that story, in confidence… and everything I told you was completely true. I pointed out that I never accused this man of raping me. However I did confide in him that this man who was at the time a married man in his thirties did come on to me, an 18 or 19 year old girl, suggesting that we should have an affair!!! He just shrugged his shoulders like he didn’t believe me… However the room fell awkwardly silent for a moment. Then someone changed the subject. </div><div><br /></div><div>I have long since forgiven the man who once betrayed my trust with an unwanted sexual advance. I hadn’t even given him a thought in years. I probably wouldn’t have thought of it now, even with the me too movement in full swing, had it not been for my old high school sweetheart bringing it up and accusing me of being one of those hysterical women who randomly accused men of sexual misconduct just for attention. </div><div><br /></div><div>I don’t know why he did what he did, or what was going on in his life that led him think that behavior would be ok. But, I had moved past it. So much of life has happened since then. I let it go. I don’t have the need to carry around any pain or resentment over something that happened years ago. </div><div><br /></div><div>As far as I know the man who came on to me all those years ago is still married to the same woman he was married to back then. I don’t envy her. I imagine she may know he strayed at times. I sincerely hope he found peace and happiness in his soul, and in his marriage. Although I do hope he didn’t go on to traumatize any more young woman… I don’t really know if there is anything I could have done better or differently to prevent that. </div><div><br /></div><div>Had I told anyone else what happened to me way back then would it have changed anything? I don’t really know, but I’m pretty sure it would have created a scandal in the church and upset a lot of people. I know in my heart that when this experience happened to me, I behaved with integrity. I stood up for myself. I told him NO. What he did, if he hasn’t pushed it deep down into a state of denial, he has to come to terms with. I is between him and his God now. My experience with him was in the past, and I am finished with it. He’s an old man now. If I saw him today, all I would feel towards him would be pity. </div><div><br /></div><div>However, I’m finding it a bit harder to forgive and forget about the betrayal of my former high school sweetheart. Strangely enough his actions hurt me more deeply than the actions of the creepy church man. I hope someday I have the opportunity to have another conversation with my old high school sweetheart to resolve this… but even if this day never comes, I do hope to come to the place where I can forgive him and let it go completely. Because I don’t need this icky feeling. </div><div><br /></div><div>I believe all people are capable of change and growth. We all have made mistakes. Although I do believe in holding ourselves accountable for mistakes, learning from them and making an effort, whenever possible to make things right. However I don’t think any of us should be judged to harshly for things we did many years ago. I believe in forgiveness. For ourselves as much as for the person we are forgiving. Let’s give each other some grace and room to grow and change for the better. </div><div><br /></div><div>My suggestion, if anyone out there has unresolved issues with someone, and believes you may have (intentionally or unintentionally) hurt someone or treated someone wrong in some way, please make the effort to reach out and make amends. This could make a huge difference in someone’s life, and very possibly make a big difference in your own growth and healing process. Owning up to and making amends for our mistakes is a powerful and courageous thing to do. </div><div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div></div></div>Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-50974895929090865192014-12-20T16:00:00.000-08:002016-02-21T00:41:55.567-08:00STRESSBUSTER TIPS<div class="paragraphstyle" style="background: white; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; mso-line-height-alt: 12.0pt;">
<b><span style="font-family: "times" , serif;"><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 12pt;">Many people experience an </span><span style="font-size: 13.6000003814697px; line-height: 16px;">increase in</span><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 12pt;"> stress around the Holidays. Here are some tips that I find useful. You might find them useful too. BTW you may use these tips anytime of year. :) </span></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "times" , serif;"><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 12pt;"><br /></span></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "times" , serif;"><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 12pt;">Tip # 1: </span></span><span class="apple-converted-space" style="font-family: "times" , serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 12pt;"> </span><span class="style1" style="font-family: "times" , serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 12pt;">BREATHE</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt;">The fastest remedy for a stressful situation is to modify the simple
task of Breathing.<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Stress causes shallow, fast paced, chest breathing -- which creates an
anxiety (fight or flight) response in the body. <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="paragraphstyle1" style="background: white; line-height: 10.35pt; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;">You can reduce this by consciously taking three (3) deep, slow, belly
breaths.<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Try it now!<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="paragraphstyle1" style="background: white; line-height: 10.35pt; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Notice how you are feeling in the moment, now take three deep, slow
breaths, feel your belly fill as you inhale, feel it empty as you exhale, on
the last breath let out an audible "SIGH". Now, how do you
feel?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "times" , serif; font-size: 10pt;">Tip # 2: <span class="style1">MEDITATE</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Meditation has been shown to quiet the mind, relax the body, reduce
blood pressure and re-focus your concentration.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Try it now!<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Sit comfortably (hopefully in a quiet, uninterrupted space), do your
Breathing Exercise, take three deep, full breaths, letting the last one out
with a "sigh". Let your eyes close, and bring your attention to
your breath, simply observe the breath as it goes in and out, if your mind
starts to wander to other thoughts, gently bring your attention back to the
breath. This is called Mindfulness Meditation, and can be done for as
short as one minute to up to 20 min. If you want to add a Mantra (sound)
to the meditation, you can repeat silently in your mind the Sound of Breath,
"So Hum". With each inhale think "So" and with each exhale
"Hum" continue for 5-20 min. and see how calm, centered and focused
the Meditation leaves you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "times" , serif; font-size: 10pt;">Tip # 3: <span class="style1">MOVE IT!</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Sitting for too long at your desk is a major cause of aches and
pains. Get up and move your body, whether it is a walk to the restroom,
or to refill your water bottle, or to just stand up and STRETCH, to go for a
walk or a run at lunch, whatever you like to do, just do it. Every hour
if you can, put on an alarm that will remind you to take a movement
break. Movement keeps your circulation going, prevents edema in the feet
and legs, lubricates the joints and relieves stiffness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="paragraphstyle1" style="background: white; line-height: 10.35pt; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Try it now!<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="paragraphstyle1" style="background: white; line-height: 10.35pt; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Stand up, take in a big breath and raise your arms above your head,
stretch towards the sky, now let them gently fall to your sides as you
exhale. Try it three times. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "times" , serif; font-size: 10pt;">Tip # 4: COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS!<i><br />
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<span style="font-size: 10pt;">An attitude of Gratitude has been shown to relieve stress and alter
negative or depressed thinking. <span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="paragraphstyle1" style="background: white; line-height: 10.35pt; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Try it now!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt;">Take out a piece of paper and write a quick Gratitude list for the year,
add in all of your accomplishments, then a list of the people in your life that
you are thankful for. Call or email one of those people right now and let them
know how much you appreciate having them in your life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="style5"><b><span style="font-family: "times" , serif; font-size: 10pt;">Tip # 5: Take ME time!</span></b></span><b><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><br />
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<span class="style6"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">The holidays are filled with giving, time, gifts, energy
to others. As you give, give, give, don't forget yourself. Honor
yourself with the gift of some down time, some ME time, some time to: Take a
Hot Bath, Be in Nature, Take a Walk, <b>Get a Massage,</b> whatever it is that
replenishes you. If you don't take care of yourself, you will have nothing
to give to others.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="font-size: 10pt;"> </span></span><span class="style6"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Plan
it, schedule it, block time for it. DO IT NOW!</span></span><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="background: white; color: #141823; font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">To schedule an appointment give me a call
916-342-1756. <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="background: white; color: #141823; font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;">My Website: </span></b><b><span style="background: white; color: #141823; font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> <a href="https://www.blogger.com/goog_485055927"> </a></span></b><span style="color: #141823; font-family: "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: 13.6000003814697px; line-height: 15.3333330154419px;"><b><a href="http://goddessjeanetta.wix.com/angelstouchmassage">http://goddessjeanetta.wix.com/angelstouchmassage</a></b></span></span></div>
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Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-70452546041448376992014-10-23T00:26:00.003-07:002014-10-23T00:26:45.053-07:00MOVING AGAIN! HELP WANTED.<div style="background-color: #e6e6e6; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.670588); font-family: Whitney, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 17.9200000762939px; margin-bottom: 18px; padding: 0px;">
<span style="font-weight: 700;">Some of you may have already heard, but I need to move ASAP! </span>I know I know, I just did this a little over a year ago... but I don't really have a choice because the management at my current location is not happy with me having so many guests over for healing treatments or other various events. </div>
<div style="background-color: #e6e6e6; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.670588); font-family: Whitney, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 17.9200000762939px; margin-bottom: 18px; padding: 0px;">
<span style="font-weight: 700;">I am relocation to a place where this will not be an issue;</span> to a larger 2 bedroom apartment (just 1 and 1/2 miles away) and I am seeking some help with moving furniture and boxes. </div>
<div style="background-color: #e6e6e6; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.670588); font-family: Whitney, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 17.9200000762939px; margin-bottom: 18px; padding: 0px;">
<span style="font-weight: 700;">We will begin around 10 am at my current location, </span>but even if you can not get here that early, we could use some help a little later on at the other end to unload the truck etc. so please give me a call if you are stopping by later and want to know where to find us. I will send the destination address information to those of you who RSVP. </div>
<div style="background-color: #e6e6e6; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.670588); font-family: Whitney, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 17.9200000762939px; margin-bottom: 18px; padding: 0px;">
<span style="font-weight: 700;">Please let me know if you are available </span>for either Friday October 31st (to help me with packing up last minute stuff) or Saturday Nov. 1st. which is the main moving day to move furniture, boxes and stuff. I have a truck reserved. If you can help me out on moving day please RSVP.</div>
<div style="background-color: #e6e6e6; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.670588); font-family: Whitney, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 17.9200000762939px; margin-bottom: 18px; padding: 0px;">
<span style="font-weight: 700;">PS:</span> Temporarily I am using an alternate place for individual massage and healing treatments and will not personally be offering any more meetup events until I am settled in my new place. </div>
<div style="background-color: #e6e6e6; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.670588); font-family: Whitney, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 17.9200000762939px; margin-bottom: 18px; padding: 0px;">
Check out my new website: http://goddessjeanetta.wix.com/angelstouchmassage</div>
<div style="background-color: #e6e6e6; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.670588); font-family: Whitney, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 17.9200000762939px; margin-bottom: 18px; padding: 0px;">
<a href="https://www.facebook.com/events/714192528668042/" style="color: #2175b1; cursor: pointer; display: inline; text-decoration: none;">https://www.facebook.com/events/714192528668042/</a> </div>
Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-6191455305802653872013-10-02T12:28:00.001-07:002013-10-02T12:28:57.664-07:00Unpacking My RAT<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Dear Friends, Family and Fans!</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Now that my daughter is all grown up and has moved out with her beloved into their own apartment, I just wanted to lets you all know that I have moved as well!!! It was high time to down size my space and expenses. I got rid of soooo much stuff. This has been a gigantic purging ordeal for me. Packing up and moving my belongings was only a small fraction of the overal</span><span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">l moving picture for me. The biggest part was that I really had to battle with the excess of stuff I had accumulated over the years. (I call this process "unpacking my rat"). After some internal struggles with the practice of non attachment, an exhausting amount of work sorting, selling several items, donating several more, and paying a huge bill to the hard working guys from 1 800 Got Junk for hauling away a little over 2 truck loads of "stuff"... as of the first of October, I have emerged victorious! My new location, for home and work, is in the University Heights / Hillcrest area of San Diego. I am "ALMOST" settled in... Still working on unpacking and trying to find places for all the things I kept, but I plan to have an apartment warming party for all my friends very soon. If you want to visit me, or schedule an appointment with me, please feel free to contact me. I am already seeing clients at my new location. <i class="_4-k1 img sp_2a7397 sx_d5ba65" style="background-image: url(https://fbstatic-a.akamaihd.net/rsrc.php/v2/yc/r/ERwAtiRKR7Q.png); background-position: -51px -715px; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; background-size: auto; display: inline-block; height: 16px; vertical-align: -3px; width: 16px;"></i></span><br />
<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span>
<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">With Love and Light, Jeanetta</span><br />
<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span>
<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><a href="http://goddessjeanette.moonfruit.com/">http://goddessjeanette.moonfruit.com/</a></span>Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-22450832466178040802013-03-20T13:06:00.001-07:002013-03-20T13:06:49.208-07:0050 Shades of Tantra<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-dhLpPccDxQ8/UUbbY6A24pI/AAAAAAAAAFc/YZFLrtoZgM8/s1600/tantric_sex.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="232" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-dhLpPccDxQ8/UUbbY6A24pI/AAAAAAAAAFc/YZFLrtoZgM8/s320/tantric_sex.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><em><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Hoping to get your pulse racing, your
kundalini rising, and your chakras spinning like tops? Not all Tantra is the
same. Let’s start by exploring 5 paths of Tantra to get your aura started. </span></em></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><em><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></em></o:p></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I imagine that 50
shades is actually a modest estimation. This is increasingly true in this
modern age, especially now that Tantra is becoming so popular here in the West.
Tantra has been around for thousands of years and continues to evolve as Eastern
philosophy meets Western psychology. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><a href="http://goddessjeanette.moonfruit.com/" target="_blank">Allow me to guide you toward the shade of Tantra that suits you.</a> I will describe 5 paths
of Tantra. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Each path is represented by a
color. Within these five tantric paths, there are easily 10 variations or shades
of interpretation available, which would give you the proverbial 50 shades of
Tantra. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">White Tantra</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"> is used to describe a spiritual path of
Tantra which incorporates meditation, breath work, sounds and postures. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Although all of the major chakras or energy
centers are recognized in this practice, it is the upper two chakras; the third
eye and the crown chakra, which seem to get all the conscious attention. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These are the energy centers that connect with
our intuition and spirituality.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In this
culture we tend to equate Tantra with great sex. However, the white path
doesn’t really focus on the physical act of sex at all! White Tantra is
primarily a solo practice between you and spirit. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Although this is a solo practice, White Tantra
does acknowledge relationships as having merit. The various people who come
into our lives are said to provide us with a mirror to help us learn and grow. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Personally, I
define Tantra as more of a philosophy than a religion. However, I recognize
that there are some people who practice Tantra religiously. Some forms of
Tantra have become so intertwined with the beliefs of a specific religion such
as; Hinduism, Taoism, or Buddhism that it is difficult to sort out where the
religion ends and the Tantra begins.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Within
the practice of White Tantra, sexual energy is often re-directed or channeled
towards spiritual transformation, creative endeavors, healing, expanded
awareness, and what some might refer to as enlightenment. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sexual activity is not strictly “forbidden” by
most of the White Tantra practices; however, quite often followers of White
Tantra are influenced by religious teaching that value chastity, sexual
abstinence or celibacy. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">If you are an individual
who is seeking a journey of spiritual enlightenment or a deeper connection with
God or spirit, then perhaps white Tantra is for you. Kundalini yoga is a
popular practice in this culture that is often categorized as White Tantra. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, if your reason for exploring tantra
is primarily in hopes of learning new ways to improve your sex life, you may be
disappointed. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Red Tantra</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"> is a path of Tantra best known for bringing us Tantric Sex. Red Tantra
is primarily a practice that you do with your partner. The union between you
and your beloved is seen as a form of god and goddess worship that creates not
only a bond with your partner but a bridge or connection to the divine god and
goddess. You and your partner embody the god and goddess, and when you come
together to make love using Tantric Rituals, you join body, heart, mind and
spirit. All of the chakras or energy centers of the body are involved in the
connection. The intention is to create a piece of heaven on Earth that
transcends the physical act of sex. By incorporating Tantric practice into your
love life, you can reach not only higher levels of pleasure and connection, but
a higher spiritual vibration as well. </span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">My understanding
is that in India, Red Tantra was originally a highly advanced spiritual
practice that was only taught to those who had achieved a level of mastery of
the White Path of Tantra. Today there are secular forms of Red Tantra in the
West that do not require followers to achieve any mastery. The focus of this
more secular form of Tantra is primarily on exploring bliss, ecstasy, and all the
pleasurable sensations you can achieve during love making. Tantric Sex is now something
that couples may explore, with or without the original spiritual intent. </span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Red Tantra is
known for luxurious love making sessions that last for hours, ideally leading
to multiple, full-body orgasms… with or without an ejaculation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The more secular forms of Red Tantra focus on
erotic and romantic love, activating mostly the lower chakras; the primal, sexual
and sensual energies of the root and sacral chakras. However, without the
spiritual component to the practice, the upper chakras do not receive as much
attention. The sacred forms of Red Tantra lead to a sense of euphoric oneness
not only with your partner, but with the universe and God. The more secular
forms of Red Tantra encourage couples to spend lots of time making love and exploring
heightened levels of pleasure. However, this secular practice lacks the
experience of spiritual love, and the universal connection that is the point of
the sacred practice of Red Tantra. </span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Pink Tantra</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"> refers to a heart centered path of tantra that blends many of the
elements of White Tantra (generally without the tendency to embrace a life of
celibacy) with some aspects of Red Tantra (without the need for a full time
Tantric Partner to practice with.) Within the path of Pink Tantra, all of the
chakras are acknowledged. However, there seems to be an emphasis on the
importance of the heart; opening the heart chakra and healing the heart.
Compassion, acceptance and forgiveness for others and for our self are central themes
to this practice. Pink Tantra teaches us to cultivate love without attachment,
ownership or expectation. With Pink Tantra love is seen as the impetus for healing
and transformation. </span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Pink Tantra is a
great path to follow if you are currently single, struggling with your current
relationship, or for those who adopt a more open love style such as
polyamory.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pink Tantra provides
techniques and practices to help you heal from past heartaches, to improve your
overall feeling of an emotionally balanced life and to connect with your true
self.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pink Tantra recognizes the
importance of polarity between masculine and feminine energy. Practicing Pink
Tantra will often result in you attracting a good potential mate who complements
and resonates with your energy. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you
are already in a love relationship, this practice will ideally deepen and
strengthen your partnership.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If your
relationship was struggling, you may experience a rekindling of an emotional
and passionate connection with your partner. However, this practice encourages
personal wholeness. Sometimes this practice will enable someone to leave a
partner who is abusive, or otherwise keeping them from being an authentic
expression of their true self. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Black Tantra</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"> is a path of tantra that incorporates magic
and is clouded in mystery. Sometimes Black Tantra is referred to as Dark Tantra.
Some have compared this path of Tantra to the black magic of voodoo. Black
Tantrikas are often feared in India. I suspect that there is a lot of misconception
of this path because it is not practiced openly. The teachings are
intentionally well guarded to protect it from being misused by those with less
than pure intentions. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Black Tantra has
not been widely or openly practiced in the US. One aspect of Black Tantra that
has made an impression on our Western consciousness is Sex Magic, which is a
little like practicing “The Secret” with the powerful addition of using sexual
energy to manifest your intentions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Integrity and discretion are extremely important to the successful
practice of Black Tantra. Generally speaking, it is extremely difficult to find
anyone willing to teach you the most powerful techniques of Black Tantra without
undergoing a vigorous screening and initiation process.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Here in the US, as well as many parts of
Europe, we tend to be very skeptical of anything magical, mystical or anything
that cannot be explained by our current understanding of science. If this magical
Tantra is what you are seeking, it is possible to find it if you persevere, and
are willing to follow the protocols of your teacher, but it tends to be a lot
harder to find than the other types of Tantra, and unfortunately easily
confused with an entirely different form of Tantra with a similar name that I
will describe next. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<strong><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-weight: normal; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Dark
Tantra</span></strong><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> is sometimes mistakenly called Black Tantra by those who
are not aware that the term Black Tantra has already been taken. This alternative
meaning <span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">refers to a fusion of a Tantric
Sex and BDSM. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I believe this path </span>has
emerged in very recent times. <span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">My
understanding is that "Dark Tantra" was "invented" here in
Western culture, I believe by people who really had a very limited or perhaps
no understanding of the original meaning of Dark or Black Tantra. Basically
Dark Tantra seems to be a secular sexual practice that doesn't have much to do
with the spiritual practices of Tantra. I have heard some argue that there is a
spiritual aspect to this Dark Tantra. I can imagine that this could be true for
some individuals who are on a path of exploring their "shadow" or
seeking to sink deeper into trust and surrender, but based on conversations I
have had with people who claim to be exploring Dark Tantra, I believe that it
is more often practiced as a form of self expression and sexual exploration
than for the purpose of spiritual enlightenment. </span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">My Tantric Path</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"> is an eclectic one. However, when it comes to what I teach it appears to fit most closely into the category of Pink
Tantra. I do use some aspects of White Tantra, such as meditation and breath-work.
I also introduce the teachings of Red Tantra, particularly to the
couples who come to see me. However, most of my clients are either single or
married to partners who do not support or participate in their practice of Tantra.
This limits my ability to teach Red Tantra as it was intended. </span></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">I am familiar
with the concepts of sex magic, and have taught some workshops about how to use
sex magic to manifest our desires; however, I do not consider myself to be an
authority on the subject of Black Tantra. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">I incorporate some aspects of "sensation
play" into my sessions; however, I would not characterize what I do as
Dark Tantra either. I am in charge of the session as the goddess (healer and
teacher) and expect to be treated with reverence; however, I am not a
Dominatrix by any stretch of the imagination. I fully support people's right to
choose a life style such as BDSM if that is what they are into, or to
experiment with whatever aspects of BDSM appeals to them as a form of self
expression or to spice up their love life. However, it is not really my
personal hot button or mission to teach this Dark Path of Tantra. </span></span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>My modalities of
choice are love and light</strong> which resonates well with the heart centered practice
of Pink Tantra. If you would like to speak with me about incorporating Tantra
into your life, either via a verbal life coaching session or a hands on healing Tantra
session, <a href="http://goddessjeanette.moonfruit.com/" target="_blank">please take a look at my website and contact me ASAP.</a> <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
</span></span></span><br />Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-31915023002788616302013-03-10T19:04:00.000-07:002013-03-15T14:33:37.629-07:003 Ways to Improve Your Sex Life<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-O99t0cVGoFg/UT04lm8UjgI/AAAAAAAAAEc/ungHRF4xXpg/s1600/penthouse-kamasutra-1-the-art-of-making-loves-338.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-O99t0cVGoFg/UT04lm8UjgI/AAAAAAAAAEc/ungHRF4xXpg/s320/penthouse-kamasutra-1-the-art-of-making-loves-338.jpg" width="248" /></a></div>
<em><span style="font-family: Arial;"> </span>A sexually savvy lover is always curious and open to learn new ways to make sex even better.</em><em> For 3 fundamental ways to improve your sex life, read on... </em><br />
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<b><span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">1. Make sex a priority.</span></b><span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Let’s face it. Most of us
have very busy lives. In order to get the important things done, like it or
not, we really need to form a plan and follow a schedule. If we wait for the
perfect moment before we do something, many times things just don’t happen…
especially if it involves coordinating with another person. Sex is an extremely
valuable part of our lives; for our overall health, happiness and emotional
well being. It is also an import part of a healthy romantic partnership.
Neglecting our sex life can have a devastating effect on our relationship with
our partner and our entire life. So why don’t we spend a little more time
thinking about what a vibrant healthy sex life would look like for us? Sharing
fantasies and secret desires with your partner can be very intimate. Need some
fresh new inspiration? Try reading a sexy book or watching a sexy movie
together. Once you have a picture in mind of what really turns you on and what
you would like to do, why not communicate and strategizing ways to make it
happen? <span style="color: #ae0d55;"><a href="http://goddessjeanette.moonfruit.com/#/love-life-coaching/4569688998" target="_blank">For information about a Love Life Coaching session with Goddess Jeanetta, over the phone or in person, click here.</a></span></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">2. Become sexually savvy</span></b><span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">. Sometime people are
discouraged and resentful because they want to have sex, but their partner no
longer does. There are many reasons why someone might lose interest is sex;
some of them situational, emotional, or medical, in nature. If your partner has
lost interest in having sex it is important to investigate why. For example, if
vaginal dryness is making sex painful, perhaps using a generous amount of
lubricant could make a world of difference. Sometimes people confide in me that
the sex is just not satisfying or that their partner doesn’t show any interest in
them or touch them unless they want sex. Your partner may really long for a
deeper connection with you; creating an emotional as well as a sexual intimacy.
However, it is hard to enjoy making love to someone who is insensitive to our
emotional or physical needs, or only seems interested in their own pleasure. A
sexually savvy lover is an attentive lover who takes the time to learn what
turns their partner on and delights in their partner’s pleasure. If you desire
to be a competent and attentive lover, you will make it a point to tune into
the emotional and sexual needs of your partner. You will show interest in them,
what they think and how they feel, and not just when you want to have sex with
them. You will ask your partner how and where he or she would like to be
touched and experiment with different techniques and sex positions. You will
look into your partner’s eyes, kiss them passionately, notice the expressions
on their face, listen to the words and sounds that come out of your partner’s
mouth, as well as what their body language is saying. Most importantly, you
will remember that sex is supposed to be fun. You will be playful, experimental
and creative, treat sex as an adventure, and your partner as your dearest
playmate and lover. A sexually savvy lover genuinely enjoys sex and is always
curious and open to learn new ways to make sex even better. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<b><span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">3. Make a date.</span></b><span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Some people resist the
idea of carving out time specifically for sex, claiming that sex should just
happen spontaneous. However, spontaneity is seriously over rated. People may
assume they don’t need to make plans to be together because they live in the
same house and sleep in the same bed, but all too often their sex life begins
to suffer the moment they stop dating and start taking each other for granted.
Making a date does many things to improve your odds of having quality sex on a
regular basis. Making specific plans to be with our partner at a specific time
helps us to mentally set everything else aside, and really focus on each other.
Knowing that we have plans to be with our partner also allows us to prepare,
build sexual excitement and anticipation as we look forward to our special
“date”. Some of your dates may be romantic or fun dates where the point is to
spend time together doing something that gets you and your partner out of the
house, sharing an experience, and hopefully putting you both in a more playful
mood. However, you should also make specific plans to stay in for some sexy
time. Why not make a “sex date”? Put on some sexy lingerie, turn off the TV and
your cell phones, light a candle, put on a little romantic music and spend some
quality time making love. You may even spice it up now and then by going
somewhere special for a sexual encounter with each other. A little weekend
getaway or a rendezvous can go a long way to make you feel more romantic and
passionate. Personally I think we can (and should) have a love affair with our
partner.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><a href="http://goddessjeanette.moonfruit.com/#/love-life-coaching/4569688998" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ae0d55;">For information about a Love Life Coaching session with Goddess Jeanetta, over the phone or in person, click here to see website. </span></a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span></div>
Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-35154187928861037712013-03-10T03:20:00.001-07:002013-03-18T02:24:18.188-07:00How I became Goddess Jeanetta<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-fDIjS7tP7nM/UTxZmPTrZ2I/AAAAAAAAAEM/cMYSPzd0P_k/s1600/GoddessShakti.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-fDIjS7tP7nM/UTxZmPTrZ2I/AAAAAAAAAEM/cMYSPzd0P_k/s320/GoddessShakti.jpg" width="183" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">Every now and then people ask me questions about my name.
Those who know me personally or have heard me called
by other names are especially prone to ask questions. I am aware that
the evolution of my persona may be a bit confusing for some people. Today I am here
to offer some clarification about some of the various over-lapping professional
and personal hats I have worn, and to reveal how I became
known as Goddess Jeanetta. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">In certain lines of work it is a common occurrence to
have a work name that is different from the name that was given at birth. Actors,
musicians, and writers are among those who often
have a stage name, a persona or a pen name that they go by. Tantrikas are also among the professions that tend to take on a
persona for their work. Sometimes,
people maintain more than one persona simultaneously, especially if they wear
more than one professional hat. The
process of finding the right name often evolves and changes as the individual
artist develops and fine tunes their craft.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Once
an artist becomes well known, it becomes much more difficult to change their name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At some point a name emerges and takes hold to represent this entity in
the hearts and minds of their fans or devotees. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">In the past I was known as <strong>Reiki Angel, </strong>initially strictly for
business purposes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I believe it was in
2003 that I first began using Reiki Angel as an advisor on Ingenio.
At that time I was also working full time as a
psychiatric case manager.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I noticed that
many of the other advisers on this site created an advisor name that was
obviously not their given name. Especially in light of the type of professional
work I did, I did not want to use my real name or anything too close to my real
name for this alternative healing. At
first I offered remote Reiki healing and advice exclusively over the phone. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Next I started offering hands on reiki healing services, on a very limited basis during evenings and weekends. I
was still working full time in the mental health field, so when I was in my
role as a Reiki healer, I used the name Reiki Angel as my part-time energetic
healing persona. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">Over the next few years I went to Body Mind College to study massage and holistic health. Eventually
I left my mental health job and expanded my energetic healing practice into a full time career that included not only reiki but massage
as well. After a couple more years of further training and exploration, numerous
tantric workshops and courses, I became a certified Tantric Healer and added Tantra
as another healing modality into my practice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Since my practice was no longer limited exclusively to Reiki, sometime in
2006 I began referring to my healing massage practice as <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Angels Touch</b>. Although I no longer use the name Reiki Angel
for my business, it remained as a nickname that still appears
in some of the social networking places I use. I still offer remote reiki healing
and advice over the phone through Ingenio. However, my advice is no longer limited
to reiki. Today people most often call me for advice to improve their love life. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A couple years ago I changed my advisor name
from Reiki Angel to <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Reiki Goddess</b>. I
made this subtle change to incorporate the divine tantric aspect of my practice,
yet intentionally kept it similar to my original name in the hopes that my previous
clients would be able to find and recognize me as the same advisor. </span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">Goddess
Jeanetta</span></b><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"> is an honorary tantric title that I have used within the
tantra community in San Diego for several years, as well as for my online Tantric
persona. I started using it shortly after I began offering Tantra as a healing
modality in 2007. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
first began using this name when I was invited to post a profile as a goddess on a website that
features Tantra teachers and providers. All of the women listed
on this site were called goddesses and all the men were called gods. To start
my listing on this particular site, I had a phone conversation with the site
manager. She asked me what name I wanted to use for the listing. Although my initial intention was to simply use <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Jeanette</b>, she miss
heard me, and thought I said <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Jeanetta</b>.
She converted my name to Goddess Jeanetta for the listing. By simply adding
the divine title of respect in front of my name, as was the practice for all of the sacred professionals on this site, Goddess Jeanetta was born.
Although it started out as a mistake, I decide I liked the way
Goddess Jeanetta rolled off the tongue, so I kept it. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Next I broadened the use of Goddess Jeanetta
to my own website and other listings that I created specifically for Tantra. Next
I started using this name for the Meet-up groups and workshops that I
facilitated. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">As time went on, I recognized that I loved
to write. I felt that using the written word was yet another way I could spread the message of love and transformational awareness. I started writing short stories
and messages that I shared with my friends through an occasional post, blog or
tweet. Encouraged by the response of my freinds, I decide to try my hand at being an author. I began writing a book, "Seven Secret of Sexual Savvy". My
pen name that I adopted was <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Jeanetta
Goddette</b>; a play on the title Goddess Jeanetta, with the more conventional
appearance and order of a first and last name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I came up with this pen name in 2011 for the purpose of publishing books
and professional blog writing. When I was contemplating what to pick as my pen
name, I wanted there to be some continuity with my already emerging Goddess Jeanetta
persona. I decided to keep Jeanetta as my first name, and set out to find a last name with God in it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span> I contemplated Godfrey, Godchild, Godwin,
Goddard, Godet and Goddette, and perhaps a few other God names. However, visually and
vocally Goddette (spelled with two Ds and Ts) most resembled Goddess. I also
did some on-line research to learn the meaning of Goddette, and I liked what I
read. I got several different yet somewhat related interpretations. One reliable
source indicated that this name is a respelling of the southern French surname Gaudet,
from the root gaud, meaning "happy" or "lively", similar to
the Latin gaudere which means "to rejoice".<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Another source stated that this name dates
back to the time when France was immersed in the Dark Ages. This name, from the
Normandy region of France, was derived from the given name Gaudi
which means "ruler". <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Other
sources indicated that this name means "favored of God" or
"having god (or goddess) like qualities". </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">I selected this particular pen name because of its
similarity to my already emerging tantric persona and because I like the way it
sounds. I would love to be seen as a happy, lively goddess. All of the various
mentioned possible meanings associated with the name Goddette sounded appealing
to me. I do wish to inspire my readers to get in touch with their inner
strength, and the divine god or goddess power that is within each of us. However,
I think of myself as more of a healer and an inspirational muse, and less of a ruler.
I am all about the love... honestly being some kind of condescending ruler;
overly controlling, stern, punitive or iron fisted, just does not really
resonate with me. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From time to time, I
get contacted by someone who mistakenly thinks (or perhaps hopes) that
I will offer some kind of discipline, or dominatrix service.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, this is not the case. I do expect my
clients to treat me with reverence. I do make a point to clarify the boundaries and what I expect from clients. I do maintain control during my sessions as
a Tantric teacher and guide. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, this is where
the similarities begin and end.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My
sessions are never about ridicule or humiliation, and it is never my intention to test your limits to
endure punishment or pain. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">My</span> gift is in my ability to help
people to relax, release old patterns, and open up to feel better about themselves. I prefer to teach how to tolerate more bliss
and pleasure in our lives. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">One thing is certain. I do have a lot to rejoice
about in my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am honored and humbled by the
name Goddess Jeanetta, and hope to use my role to remind all women
that they are goddesses, and all men that they are gods. Yes, we are flesh and
blood human beings who make mistakes. We are mortal beings who are born, live
an Earthy life, and eventually die. Yet on another level, I believe we are also
divine beings of indestructible spirit and energy that in one form or another
continues to exist. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can literally
participate in the miraculous creation of new life via procreation. We are
created with the ability to shape and manifest our world every day in
remarkably meaningful ways. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is awe
and wonder all around us. I recognize and I embrace this life with love and
passion. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">In the bible it says that we are created in the image of
God. Whether or not we believe in the bible as the literal word of God, and
regardless of whether we believe in creation or evolution, this statement still
contains a profound truth. We possess a miraculous spark of life that gives us
the potential to grow; physically, emotionally and spiritually. We have a capacity
for living a life filled with a godlike love and compassion for our fellow
human beings. It is humbling to remember that even the most annoying jerks among us were also created in the image of god. Some people have gotten so out of touch with their
higher self that it is nearly unrecognizable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Even if it is difficult to recognize, I believe god is present as a
mirror or life lesson in every person we encounter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can reflect and radiate love and godliness
once we embrace our inner divine self.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>If we are in a relationship, especially when a challenge arises, we can also
stop and remember that our partner is a god or goddess that we have the unique
privilege to be in a relationship with. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When
we remember that we are a divine creation we begin to treat ourselves and each
other with love and reverence. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">This is my mission as a Tantric teacher and healer to
spread the word that we do not need to live a life of fear, deceit and shame. We
can actually release fear and all the trauma, stress and disease it creates in our
lives. We no longer need to be controlled by self doubt and disappointments from
our past. We can live in the moment, in a state of love, gratitude and
integrity. We can speak our truth with confidence. We can stop hiding who we
really are. We can begin living our lives out loud. We can continue to make
healthy choices from a place of love. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When we do this, our lives get better. The
world actually becomes a better place. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
am here to remind you that there's nothing more attractive than a man or woman
with a mission. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Share your passion! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your enthusiasm may inspire those around you,
and will likely double your magnetic appeal. Although Goddess Jeanetta is a
title I humbly use to describe my Tantric healer persona, I also recognize that
God created me as a goddess. He gave me a light to shine, and gifts to share. This
is my reality. When I share this Tantric philosophy of love and life with those
around me, <strong><a href="http://goddessjeanette.moonfruit.com/" target="_blank">I am Goddess Jeanetta.</a></strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-40582981657789147522013-03-06T00:42:00.000-08:002013-03-15T14:25:43.262-07:00How to Communicate True Love <br />
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<a data-ved="0CAUQjRw" href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&frm=1&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&docid=T2z2pKcxuxqk4M&tbnid=zZTtF-tVG7PRZM:&ved=0CAUQjRw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fdating.lovetoknow.com%2FCouples_in_Love_Images&ei=SQA3UbC0HMPRqgHewYCoBg&bvm=bv.43287494,d.aWc&psig=AFQjCNHFY6ZBIwSvdIjI_PsI4Cgu9qV9MQ&ust=1362645338972463" id="irc_mil" style="border: 0px currentColor; clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img height="212" id="irc_mi" src="http://cf.ltkcdn.net/dating/images/slide/86746-600x399-Couples_in_Love_Images_1.jpg" style="margin-top: 5px;" width="320" /></a><span lang="EN" style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN;">Perhaps there is someone
new in your life. You want to let them know you are falling in love with them
but not sure how. Maybe you have been seeing someone for a little while now.
You realize that you are ready to deepen the bond or take things to a new level
but you don’t want to screw it up. Perhaps there is someone special who has
been in your life for a very long time. You are seeking fresh new ways to
demonstrate your love and affection, but are drawing a blank. When it comes to communicating
love, a generic one size fits all approach simply will not do. People respond best
to a personal touch. If you want someone’s heart to melt, you need to show them that you listen
to what they say, see who they are, notice what they like and pay attention to
what matters most to them. Demonstrations of love are most affective when they
are custom tailored to the individual. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN" style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN;">The same core principle that
applies to a new love, also hold true for a connection that has endured the
test of time. I read something the other day that reminded me of an important
point. We should never assume that our partner knows how we feel about them.
Sometimes people appear to forget that we need to keep love fresh and alive.
Perhaps they think that because they proclaimed their love once many years ago,
and made a lifelong commitment to their partner, that until they say otherwise,
that the on-going love is just implied. Some may believe they already are
showing their love every day because they work hard to earn a living to support
the family, provide a nice home, cook meals, keep the home running smoothly,
and come home at night. These wonderful behaviors do go a long way to foster a
sense of security and stability, but they may not be all we need to feel loved
on a more personal level. It is part of our human nature to crave love and intimacy
with our beloved. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We need to experience not
only a physical connection but an emotional connection that is alive and ongoing.
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even the toughest, most independent, and
self sufficient among us needs to feel loved every day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN" style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN;">Sometimes we may think
that it is all about the big grand gestures, and hold back from demonstrating
our love until we can offer something spectacular. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps we are saving up our money for an
expensive gift, waiting for the perfect moment or a special occasion to show
our love. But I feel that this approach is an all too common mistake that overlooks
the importance of the little day to day things. The point is to communicate
love, not to showing off how grand we are. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN" style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN;">There are simple little
ways that we can show that we love our partners every single day. The good news
is that most of them cost nothing and are not difficult. We can show our love with
a passionate kiss on the way out the door, with a thoughtful gesture that brightens
our partner’s day, with a kind word, a love note hidden in the lunch box, brief
case or a short little romantic text during the day. We can make plans to do
something together (preferably something that we know our partner would enjoy).
Our partner will feel loved; especially when we do little things that show we
are paying attention to our partner, and doing the things that what makes them
light up. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN" style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN;">The most important
secret here is to figure out what our partner needs to feel loved. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A common mistake we make is simply to assume that
our partner is just like us. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are unique
individuals. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are not all wired in the
exact same way. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There are many wonderful
ways to express love and experience love.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>How we naturally express love, and what makes us feel loved varies from
person to person depending upon our personality. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN" style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN;">Relationships are living
breathing things, a little like plants in a way. In order for a love
relationship to germinate, grow, bloom and continue to flourish, we need to
continue to care for it. Generally there is a magic combination of the right
amount of sun, water and nutrients as well as the right type of soil to
consider. In order to do a good job tending our love relationship, it is
crucial to get to know more than a thing or two about this unique individual
that is the object of our affection. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even
if you have never been much of a gardener, you probably are aware that
different plants have different specific ways they need to be cared for to
thrive. You can’t care for an African violet the same way you would treat a sun
flower, and get the best possible results. So why should we assume that expressing
love for a unique human being would be any simpler than taking care of a plant?
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN;">Perhaps you really want
to show your love, but don't know where to begin. You may have genuinely tried
to show your love in the past, but have gotten shot down. It is discouraging
when our efforts to show love get rejected, go unnoticed or under appreciated.
It can be hard, even for the most romantic at heart, to continue the pursuit
when their arrows of love seem to be missing the target. Sometimes we give up
too quickly because we assume it is too hard to figure out how to give our
partners what they need from us. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don't
lose heart. There may be a better way.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN;">Perhaps it is time for
an upgrade from gold to platinum. No, I am not talking about buying your
partner expensive jewelry. I am talking about expanding our awareness of showing
true love, not only following the principles of the “Golden rule” but adding
the wisdom of the “Platinum rule” as well. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Most people have heard of the golden rule
which advises us to treat others the way we would like others to treat us. I
believe this is a good rule because it reminds us to step out of our potentially
self-centered perspective. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To follow the
Golden Rule, we must first notice that other people want to be treated well,
just as we want to be treated well, and then take action by doing something loving.
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Platinum Rule takes this concept one
stop further and advices us to treat others the way they like to be treated.
This "rule" was initiated by Dr. Tony Alessandra, and is associated
with the Jung Personality Traits. The basic theory is that there are four
different personalities. If you can find out which one your partner is, then
you can have a long lasting relationship with them. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN;">Another concept that I think
goes hand and hand with the Platinum Rule is to recognize our partner’s primary
love language. According to Gary Chapman who wrote the book about this concept,
there are 5 Love Languages; words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving
gifts, quality time and physical touch. All five are valid ways of expressing
and experiencing love, and we may enjoy all of them at times, but we all seem
to have a favorite or primary way that makes us feel especially loved. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think it is important to understanding both
our own love language as well as our partner’s love language to effectively communicate
and express love. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
The bottom line, pay attention! Get to know your partner, how they experience love, and what makes them light up. The most effective expressions of love are ones that show you listen to what they say, see who they are, notice what they like and pay attention to what matters most to them. Once you are aware of how your partner likes to be treated, then you can communicate true love. <br /> </div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-20340394568632277012013-01-25T02:50:00.000-08:002013-01-25T22:56:14.947-08:00Simple Sensual Massage Secrets for Sweethearts<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_WQ0sO8D-k0/UQM3ySP5ScI/AAAAAAAAADk/nPnjL76t-U4/s1600/201204-massage-460.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="192" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_WQ0sO8D-k0/UQM3ySP5ScI/AAAAAAAAADk/nPnjL76t-U4/s320/201204-massage-460.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">If you have a sweetheart, you are most likely
acutely aware that the most romantic of holidays is just around the corner.
Valentine's Day is THE holiday for couples to celebrate and express romantic
love to one another. Perhaps you are already thinking about what you would like
to try this year to make this an especially romantic day. If you are seeking to
offer something more personal and intimate than a store bought Valentine's Day
card, a banquette of flowers or chocolate candies in a heart shaped box,
perhaps offering a delightfully pampering sensual massage experience would ignite
your lover's heart and passion. You may wish to simply treat your sweetheart
this time around, or perhaps suggest that you both take a turns pampering each
other. </span></span></span></span><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">For many lovers touch is a significant way to
demonstrate and communicate love. Every one of us actually needs touch for our
health and emotional well being. It's good for our circulation, our nervous
system, helps us to relax and unwind. Most of all, it can make us feel loved.
It potentially enhances the intimate connection we share with our partner. If
you really want to offer your partner something out of the ordinary, a truly
pampering sensual massage, this should involve a bit more than simply
slathering your partner with some oil or lotion for a few minutes. Very slow,
conscious touch is the best. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">A sensual massage is an art. Like most art
forms, you want to communicate something with your art. It is most meaningful
when the art comes from the heart, but without the right materials to work with
and some basic awareness of what techniques to use to get the effect you want,
your art will fall short of your vision. You may be wondering, “Where should I
begin?” I am ready to offer you some simple secret DOs and DON’Ts that if
implemented, could take your Valentine’s Day sensual massage from ordinary to
extraordinary! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;"><span style="font-size: large;">Setting
the Stage</span></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
put some thought into the details before the massage begins.</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When preparing to give a sensual massage,
it is important to keep in mind that the intention is to pamper your partner by
delighting all the senses, and giving them an exquisite experience of pleasure.
Naturally the sense of touch has center stage in a sensual massage, but we
should not forget about the rest of the senses. You are certainly not here to
offer your partner a detached, mechanical or clinical treatment. This is very
personal. When orchestrating this experience, take what you know about your
partner’s likes and dislikes into consideration. You should also consider the
timing. Ideally, going into the massage, you should not be either too full or
too hungry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Although I do not recommend
timing the massage to immediately follow a heavy meal, a light tasty snack before
your massage might be a splendid idea. This will offer some pleasure to the
taste buds and provide energy to sustain you through the massage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps you could select some sensual finger
type foods, preferably something that you know your partner likes, that you
could feed to each other. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
keep the temperature comfortable. </span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">I recommend
keeping the room a bit on the warm side; perhaps around 75 or 76 degrees or so.
You want it to be warm enough for the recipient to be totally comfortable when
uncovered (nude). The best way to know for sure is to ask the recipient if it
is warm enough, and if not, turn up the heat until it is. If the room you are
using tends to get cold or drafty, you may want to have a space heater in the
room with you. You simply want to plan ahead so that you can easily adjust the
temperature as necessary to make it pleasantly warm and toasty, yet not too hot.
Keep in mind that when it is warm enough for the recipient, it may possibly feel
a bit too warm to the one giving the massage, because whoever is giving the
massage will be exerting more energy, so be careful not to drip sweat onto your
partner. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Keep an extra hand towel handy
in case you need to wipe your brow. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
pay attention to the ambiance.</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;"> I love doing a
sensual massage in a room with a fireplace. A fire adds to the ambiance, as
well as the overall feeling of warmth. Remember, we want to delight the senses.
If a fireplace is not available, then perhaps light a candle or two. Candles
are a very nice touch to provide a subtle indirect form of lighting. Harsh bright
overhead lights are not desirable in the massage setting, because they detract
from relaxation and are not very flattering either, but fire light actually adds
to the feeling of warmth and romance. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plus
you can use scented candles to add a delightful aroma. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">Personally I think a little background music
is a very nice idea. The right selection of music can help you both you and
your partner to feel more relaxed, it can add a lot to the mood and ambiance. It
may also help you to slow down and pace yourself well to glide through the
massage. So, indulge your sense of hearing in a subtle way with some well
chosen music. Select something that is relaxing, and enhances the romantic
mood. Ideally you want the music to be something that is a nice soothing back
ground for the massage, so nothing too loud, too fast or over-bearing. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-n0iney3uD5s/UQM4GEj99oI/AAAAAAAAADs/KbMigQiTp-A/s1600/spa-treatment.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-n0iney3uD5s/UQM4GEj99oI/AAAAAAAAADs/KbMigQiTp-A/s320/spa-treatment.jpg" width="226" /></a><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
provide a comfortable place for your partner to receive the massage.</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Will you be using a massage table, spreading
a soft blanket on the floor, or perhaps using a bed? If you have a massage
table available, I would recommend using it. For one thing, using a real
massage table communicates that you intend to treat your partner to a real
luxurious massage, not simply 5 minutes of a half hearted rub down. Also, most
massage tables are adjustable, so you can set it at a height that feels good for
you, as well as making your partner comfortable. However, if a massage table is
not an option, then go the extra mile to make the best use of the space
available to communicate that something out of the ordinary is about to happen.
Perhaps you could even sprinkle some flower petals around the area, or form
them in the shape of a heart. If you are using the floor, make sure there is
enough padding underneath you and your partner; perhaps a couple of thick
blankets, quilts and a pillow or two. Cover the area you will be using with
sheets, and have a towel handy. If you are using the bed, I also recommend that
you spread an extra sheet right over the top of the covers. The idea is to make
it comfortable, clean and inviting. You also want to be sure you are giving
this massage on something that is washable. You do not want to taint this
experience with the worry of possibly ruining an expensive rug or messing up
the bed you intend to sleep in by spilled oil all over it. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DON'T
allow distractions into the environment. </span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">You don't want to
be interrupted or distracted.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
recommend turning off the ringer to your phones; cell phones and landlines. Allow
voice mail to provide a real service. If you have young children, plan ahead and
get a sitter. Make sure the room is visually pleasing, devoid of any clutter or
unfinished projects. You don't want to be distracted by thoughts of stuff that
needs to be finished or things you could potentially trip over. Turn off the TV
and, as much as possible, eliminate potential distraction; unpleasant sights,
sounds and smells… anything that might take your minds away from the pleasure
of the moment. You want the massage and the special time you are sharing with
your partner to be where all the focus goes. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;"><span style="font-size: large;">Making
a Connection</span> </span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
keep in mind the goal of creating an experience of bliss and sensual delight.</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">
You are going to use touch to communicate tender, romantic feelings and create
an intimate connection with your partner. The little details can make a really
big difference. Where will this massage be taking place and how you will prepare
the area? Think about what room will you be using; what you want to have in the
room with you, as well as what you want to make sure is not in the room with you.
Whether or not you have had any massage or bodywork training is not as
important as your ability to tune in to pleasure; your partner’s pleasure as
well as your own pleasure. Remain present, and notice what your beloved
responds too. Today you are setting out to be a touch artist, to communicate in
the language of love. <span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">Beginning with the very first touch, you want
to make a connection. Set out to not only massage your partner's body, but to touch their soul. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
use oil, or other massage product of your choice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">Personally<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"> </b>I think that using oil, as opposed to
giving a dry massage, adds a great deal to the sensory pleasure of the massage.
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How you apply the oil makes a world of
difference. How much should be used? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To some
extent, the amount of oil used may be a matter of personal preference. Personally
I prefer not to over use the oil when giving a sensual massage. I want my
partner to feel my touch and the sensation of my skin and warmth against their
skin, not just the sensation of oil dripping down their sides. If you are not
sure how much to use, I recommend using just enough oil to create a nice glide,
but no more. However, I am aware that some people may really like the
"slippery seal" sensation of lots of oil. If this is the case, then I
recommend using sheets you don't mind getting completely oily, and perhaps a
plastic drop cloth underneath. Also, have plenty of towels handy to wipe off with
when you are done. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">What type of oil should be used? I recommend
using an oil or some another product such as lotion or gel that was designed
specifically for massage. However, there are also some all natural types of oil
that you might use that you could also cook or bake with, such as coconut,
grape seed or sweet almond oil. If you would like to indulge your sense of
smell, then consider using oil that is infused with a little bit of naturally
aromatic essential oil like lavender. I like to use oil that can be safely
ingested and has a pleasant taste, especially because "kissing" may
be involved, but also because our skin absorbs what we put on it and it gets
into our system even if we do not eat it. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DON'T</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">use baby oil.</b> It tends to be too
slick, overly shiny and sits on the surface of your skin. However, there is an
even bigger reason to avoid it. Baby oil smells like… well… babies. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our sense of smell is particularly linked to
memory. This scent may be unconsciously linked with memories of taking care for
young children, especially if you are a parent, ever baby sat, or helped to
care for your younger siblings. The intention here is to create a relaxing,
intimate, adult type of sensory experience, not to trigger anxious memories of
sleepless nights changing diapers. Also void using heavily perfumed oil that
could potentially irritate sensitive areas. You want to be able to safely
explore your lover’s entire body seamlessly, without concerned over getting any
of the wrong type of product in the wrong places. So use something that can be safely
used anywhere on the body, even the most delicate parts, without irritation. Having
to stop, wash your hands and change products is just not sexy or spontaneous. Be
especially careful not to use anything that includes an ingredient your partner
is allergic too. Please, never pour cold oil directly onto your partner's body!
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
apply the oil to your own hands first, and warm up the oil.</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">
You can use a special oil warming device if you happen to have one, however, if
you are warming the oil this way be careful that you do not make it too hot. Burns
are not what we are going for here. Another way to go is to simply rub your
hands together vigorously to create some friction. This will increase the
circulation to your hands, simultaneously warming up your hands and the oil, before
you glide your hands over your partner's body. Thoughtfully apply your hands
and the pre-warmed oil to your partner’s skin through your touch. Generally a
little oil goes a long way. However, you may need to reapply the oil to your
hands if you notice that your hands are no longer gliding smoothly, or when you
get to a new area of the body. The idea is to keep a nice smooth sensual glide going
with a minimal amount of oil. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
pay attention to your posture and body alignment.</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Remember that you are not only allowed
to enjoy giving this massage, it is a much better experience for both you and
your partner if you do. However, you can’t really enjoy it if you are in pain.
Take a deep breath, make sure your body is relaxed and that you have a secure
stance with your feet. I like to stand with one foot in front on me and one
foot behind me, so I can rock or glide back and forth smoothly as if doing a
dance during the massage. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bend your knees,
and use your legs to power the movement. If you notice that your back is
starting to hurt, or your neck is getting tired, stop and reposition yourself.
If you are not comfortable while giving the massage, the quality of the massage
will suffer. Be sure to have at least a general plan of how long you want to
make this massage last at the beginning of the massage, so that you can pace
yourself accordingly, but be flexible enough to modify that plan if need be. You
want to send some loving touch into every part of your partner’s body, and you
want your energy to be able to last until the end. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">Do
the massage very slowly.</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;"> The first touch is very important for
setting the tone, so make sure your partner is ready. Then slowly, lovingly
lower your hands to make contact. I recommend holding that initial contact for
a moment before you proceed with a very slow and conscious stroke. Most people
have a tendency to move way to fast, especially when they are first learning
how to give a sensual massage. Remember this is not a race or a sports massage.
You are making love to your partner through touch. Glide over your partner’s
body slowly, enjoying every curve and detail. Allowing your partner to respond
to the sensation of your touch, and pay attention to your partner’s subtle
responses. Notice how your partner is breathing, and if you can feel the
tension melt away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pay attention to your
partner’s body language, facial expressions and sounds. Notice if you can feel
your beloved relaxing into your touch and letting go. It may help for you to
think of the massage as being a little bit like a slow romantic dance. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
add some variety to your touch. </span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">A little
repetition is alright. You do want to create a relaxing continuous feeling of
touch that feels fluid and connected. However, you certainly don't want it to
get boring. Personally I prefer to mix it up a bit. When I am giving a sensual
massage I like to vary the type and quality of strokes to keep it interesting.
I might use some deep and connected strokes using my whole hand, particularly
on areas of the body that respond well to pressure, like the back and
shoulders, even leaning in at times to add some weight and pressure with my
body, and then follow it up with some feather light touch, just using my finger
tips or very lightly scratching my nails to send delightful chills up my
lover’s spine. Experiment with the quality and type of touch and really notice
what your partner responds to favorably. Of course when you find a stroke that
gets a particularly good response from your partner, you may want to repeat
that one, or come back to it often. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
have a plan for the sequence of your massage.</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;"> You want to
massage as much of your partner’s body as possible, and leave them with a
feeling of being balanced and thoroughly pampered. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I suggest that you begin by asking your
partner lie face down, so that you can massage the back side of their body
first. Perhaps start with the area between the shoulders. Imagine that you are not
only relaxing the tension out of your partner’s body, but that you are opening
up your partner’s heart, from the back. Then slowly work your way down the
back. Give some loving attention to your partner’s lower back and buttocks. At
this point you may wish to reposition yourself at your partner’s feet. Don’t
underestimate the potential sensuality of a good massage to the feet and toes. Start
with one foot, and then slowly work your way up the leg, massaging up to and
including the buttock. Then go to the other foot and do in all again on the
other side. I realize that this sequence will have you massaging the buttocks
twice, once from above and once from below, but I believe that the derriere is worthy
of this double attention. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Keep in mind
that you are slowly working your way to the middle of the body. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DON’T
be in a rush to get overly sexual to soon. </span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">The whole massage
should be sensual, and playful, but not overly aggressive, and never rushed. You
don’t want to skip over parts or get ahead of yourself. Remember your plan. You
want the pleasure and anticipation to build slowly and steadily. Also, keep in
mind that it just doesn’t feel right if you massage one side of the body a lot more
than the other, or forget to massage one foot or leg all together. Do the best
you can to distribute your attention well. I suggest thinking of a sensual
massage as a slow tease… not as a swift attack. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">DO
ask your partner to turn over, once you are done with the back side.</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">
Now that your partner is face up, make eye contact. Remember that the intention
of a sensual massage is pleasure. Slow, conscious touch is the best approach.
Take your time and tune into your partner's rhythm. Massage your partner’s
hands, arms, shoulders and chest. Gently massage your partner’s belly. Breathe
with them and look into their eyes. Before you are tempted to skip ahead,
remember to massage the front of the legs, and pay some luxurious attention to
the inner thighs. Stay on course with your plan to get to everything. However,
you can pick up the pace and move things along faster, if you get a clear
signal from your partner that they are really ready for you to do so. Slowly work
your way to your partner’s most juicy bits. Then, if you and your partner are
ready to take things in a more erotic direction, lovingly massage your partner’s
genitals. Remember to start lightly and slowly, teasing, and building the
intensity. Check in with your partner frequently, to be sure that you are
getting the right spots, and using the right amount of pressure. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fTVxHR4382E/UQM5C2htx2I/AAAAAAAAAD4/9wgPYuA3Aq8/s1600/desire-sexy-couple-sensual-lingerie4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="167" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fTVxHR4382E/UQM5C2htx2I/AAAAAAAAAD4/9wgPYuA3Aq8/s320/desire-sexy-couple-sensual-lingerie4.jpg" width="320" /></a><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">How
you conclude this massage is up to the two of you.</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Georgia","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-themecolor: text1;">
You may choose to continue the massage with your touch, or perhaps orally
pleasure your partner to an explosive completion. However, you may want to stop
the massage at the point of blissful arousal, and save some of the energy and fireworks
to shift into love making mode. One thing I’d like to suggest, if you opt to
take the sensual massage to completion, than consider continuing to massage for
your partner beyond the big crescendo. Go back up to your partner’s neck, face,
and head. Gently massage these areas as your partner relaxes blissfully. Finally,
give your partner a tender kiss on the forehead when the massage is done. Whatever
you do, be sure to communicate, smile, laugh together and have fun. </span></div>
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fTVxHR4382E/UQM5C2htx2I/AAAAAAAAAD4/9wgPYuA3Aq8/s1600/desire-sexy-couple-sensual-lingerie4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a> </div>
<br /></div>
Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-17425020530967033102012-10-03T17:12:00.000-07:002012-10-11T15:32:38.118-07:00Rejection or Blessing in Disguise?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-BLqofivcaoE/UGzTQNILK3I/AAAAAAAAAC0/Rekt9sB-yNo/s1600/non+attachment.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="211" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-BLqofivcaoE/UGzTQNILK3I/AAAAAAAAAC0/Rekt9sB-yNo/s320/non+attachment.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Rejection? Ouch!!! There is no point in trying to pretend that any one of us is immune from the sting. Rejection can feel unpleasant, embarrassing, awkward and at times, completely devastating. It may crush our self-esteem or take us down a mental road of self-doubt, criticism and blame. Even for the most outwardly confident and self assured among us, it simply is not fun to feel rejected. In fact a sad truth is that very often the fear of rejection is what stops us from reaching our potential or going for what we really want in life. I have known people, who generally seem completely suave and confident, lose their nerve when it comes to approaching that one special person who really rocks their world. Perhaps the fear of rejection has stopped you from going for your dreams, applying for your dream job, or asking for other things that you really want. <br />
<br />
Many of us have to wrestle with this potential "demon" on a regular basis. Some careers, like mine for example, are especially prone to challenge us in regard to how we deal with rejection. If you are a service provider, an artist, a performer, in business for yourself, or in any line of work that involves selling a product or a service, then you probably know exactly what I am talking about. Today I am prepared to be transparent as I share with you a personal story of rejection, in the hopes that this may inspire you to perceive any potential rejection that comes your way in a better light; with a measure of grace, humor, and perhaps even some optimism. Yes, I know it may be hard to believe, but even "goddesses" have to deal with rejection, from time to time.<br />
<br />
I think it is just human nature to want to be liked. We want to put our best face forward when we are meeting someone new. Especially if we are getting ready to go on a job interview, or perhaps meeting someone from an online dating site for coffee, which is a lot like a job interview if you think about it. Then if the coffee date goes well... who knows, maybe a "real" date. I know that as a woman, getting ready to go on a first date with someone we think may be special is a really big deal. It might even involve shopping. We want to pick out the perfect outfit to accentuate our best features, and get our hair, nails and makeup just right. It can be a whole ritual that takes a few hours; trying on different outfits, figuring out just how to wear our hair; up, down, pulled back, falling softly around the face, curly, straight... Although the typical man may not spend quite as much time as the typical woman, I imagine most thoughtful men put some time and effort into how they groom and dress themselves for an important first impression as well, and I think we all appreciate this extra effort. I don't think there is anything wrong with trying to look our best, and being on our best behavior. First impressions can be lasting and crucial! On the other hand, pretending to be someone we are not, or creating a fake personality is never a good plan.<br />
<br />
If you have ever tried Internet dating, you may wonder if all common sense has been lost. Perhaps you have noticed that not everyone adopts a policy of honest self portrayal, which is really silly, if you hope to get past a first meet and greet with anyone. Are people simply in denial? Have they been avoiding looking directly into a mirror ever since they left high school? In their own distorted minds perhaps they still look and feel just like they did 10 or 15 years ago, or before they gained all those pounds. But I think mostly people just don't think far enough into the future when they choose a plan of action that involves misrepresentation.<br />
<br />
This shortsightedness goes beyond using outdated pictures. In an effort to appear more interesting and exciting, people will sometimes make up phony careers or describe themselves as athletic when in reality they just like to watch sports on TV. People sometimes fain an interest in hobbies or activities that they don't really care anything about, all just to impress whomever they are meeting. Even if it works at first, it will only lead to many more hours of having to fake it, until some point when you just can't take it any more, and either little by little or all at once, the truth comes out. The only really sane behavior is to be authentic and honest right from the beginning, even before a first date. <br />
<br />
We need to be honest with ourselves first, and remember that what we really want and need is to attract people into our lives who will love and appreciate the real us, just as we are. Being really authentic often takes some practice and a healthy does of self confidence. However, once you get the hang of it, I believe you will notice that it really cuts out a lot of potential heartache and rejection. It also really helps you to attract like minded people who value the same things you do. However, even authentic gods and goddesses will experience rejection, at least every now and then, because this is part of real life. People will disappoint us at times, no matter what we do. We should not blame ourselves every time someone doesn't call or doesn't show up when they promised they would. Not everyone we interact with will be as evolved, clear and honest as we would like. Sometimes people just lie to save face, change their mind, or don't really know what they want to begin with. <br />
<br />
Often times what we first may interpret as a rejection, is really dodging a bullet. I prefer a clear "no" over a disingenuous "yes" or a wishy washy "maybe" any day. The clear "no" doesn't waste my time. It frees me up to move forward, to be open to take advantage of an other opportunity right away, or to connect with someone who may be a much better fit. This has been my experience many times in my life, both personally and professionally. In fact just this week I had such an experience. I will tell you about a wonderful example of what first appeared to be a rejection, but later turned out to be a blessing in disguise. <br />
<br />
I believe that these principles of authenticity should not only be applied to dating and romantic relationships, but to our professional lives as well. If the service being offered is not accurately described, or the provider has misrepresented themselves in some way, naturally this will not lead to happy customers or repeat business. Because I value authenticity, and recognize its value for reducing the frequency of rejection, I have made an effort to include recent photographs of myself on my website. Of course, like most people, I want to put my best face forward. I select pictures that I think are flattering, wearing colors that look good on me, showing a warm inviting smile on my face, yet hopefully these pictures are an accurate representation of what I look like today. I do not wish to create an unrealistic expectation that I am some kind of twenty year old super model. I would rather have my clients arrive for a session with an idea of who to expect, and be happy to recognize me as the woman they saw in the photos.<br />
<br />
If you have taken the time to read the content of this blog or my website then I trust you see that I share who I am, as well as my overall healing philosophy quite openly. I have filled this blog with heartfelt content. My intention is to share quality information, and to extend good faith to my potential clients by modeling the kind of open communication I would like from them. I have done all this quite intentionally to attract the type of clients that want and need the healing services I offer, and to help weed out those who would not be happy with who I am or what I am offering. My etiquette page is very helpful clarifying just how I expect to be treated. Typically my methods work well. However, on rare occasions someone slips through my radar. <br />
<br />
The other day I had a new client. From the moment this client arrived, I could tell something was off. He did not smile or look me in the eyes. He seemed distracted and nervous; fidgeting with the change in his pockets. Normally I am able to put people at ease right away, but this time it didn't feel like there was anything I could do to connect with him. He didn't appear receptive to a hug hello or even a handshake. He stood awkwardly in the middle of my treatment room. I had to invite him to have a seat twice before he finally sat down. However, it was only a few seconds before he was saying something about how he forgot his cell phone in the car.<br />
<br />
I touched his hand and looked him right in the eyes and said,"you seem a little nervous, is everything OK?" For a split second, I felt a connection. He took a deep breath and let it out. He finally made eye contact with me for about 3 seconds. He looked like he wanted to share something real, but then he looked away and said "everything is fine" and went right back into the phony cell phone story. So I said, "Sure... go." I knew this was an excuse to get out the door, but I did not try to stop him. A moment after he got into his car I could hear the engine start up, and then him driving away. <br />
<br />
I wished he had been able to just tell me directly that he had changed his mind, or whatever was going on. I did not allow myself to go down the whole road of self doubt. I resisted the impulse to call or text him to ask why. There was a momentary feeling of loss. This was certainly unsettling. He had shut me out before we began. I had gotten mentally as well as physically prepared to offer a healing session, but I hadn't gotten the opportunity to show my magic. Plus, I really could have used the money from this session. However, what I realized that I felt most of all was a sense of relief. I took a deep clearing breathe and simply let it go. Just then my phone rang. It was him, the same client who had just walked out my door! He called to apologize for leaving. He told me that he had gotten nervous and didn't feel comfortable. I told him that honestly it was a little unsettling that he just left like that, but I told him that his call made me feel much better. I thanked him for telling me the truth. I let him know that I thought it was a good thing he paid attention to how he was feeling, and I thanked him for taking care of himself. It was a short little conversation, but it gave me a deep sense of closure. I felt surprisingly calm.<br />
<br />
Not even five minutes went by and I got a call from another prospective client who gladly answered all my screening questions, and said all the right things, but he was hoping he could see me right away, if at all possible. It felt like a gift from the Universe. Since I was all ready set up and prepared, and my schedule had just magically cleared up, I was able to do something I generally do not do. I booked an immediate session. In about twenty minutes, I was facilitating a wonderful healing session with a very charming, calm and receptive client. Everything felt perfect, as it should be. I was so glad that the first client had opted to leave so that I was available to meet with this new client. After our session was over, this client shared with me that he had been interested in coming to see me for awhile. He told me that he had read all the details of my website and was contemplating calling me maybe for a couple months, but hadn't gotten up the nerve until today. He said he just got what felt like a strong impulse that today was the day to call me and schedule a session. He also said that he was very glad that he had followed that impulse... that it was exactly what he needed and he made plans to return in two weeks. <br />
<br />
My final assessment of this apparent "rejection" was that it was truly a blessing in disguise, and perhaps a gift from the Universe to reinforce my faith. Historically I have been a rather sensitive person and tend to take everything to heart. I could have easily let this experience dash my spirits but I didn't, and I didn't waist my energy wondering what was wrong with me and why he had rejected me? It was wonderful to see this all play out so quickly. What a lovely opportunity to experience how "non-attachment" can work magic. When I was able to graciously let go of the feeling of wanting to complete a session with a client who was really not ready to have a healing session with me, then I was open to fully receive a client who was ready to have a healing session with me. Now I am ready to see what other magic this practice of non-attachment will work in my life. <br />
<br />Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-87471100439443920762012-09-21T03:52:00.000-07:002013-03-15T21:08:42.062-07:00How to get the BEST possible massage. <div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_I831aHhPCE/UFxBwL4bzLI/AAAAAAAAACc/t4kZE4Au6LE/s1600/massage2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_I831aHhPCE/UFxBwL4bzLI/AAAAAAAAACc/t4kZE4Au6LE/s320/massage2.jpg" width="320" /></a>Have you ever slowing gotten up out of bed, and noticed every muscle seems
to be screaming at you? Have you ever felt the stress level in your life get so
high that it feels like you have to walk on your tip toes just to keep your
head above it? Perhaps you are experiencing a serious lack of nurturing touch
in your life? I can just imagine that you might have thought to yourself,
<a href="http://goddessjeanette.moonfruit.com/" target="_blank">"I really need a good massage?"</a> However, if you do not already have a
great massage therapist on speed dial, the challenge is often finding the right
fit for you and your needs. There are so many choices available. Many people
"claim" to be the ONE you want to see, but how can you really tell
what your experience will be like with a new therapist, and if this will be a good
fit? Is it all just a matter of luck? Sometimes you may just want to give
someone new a try. Their advertisement may look very inviting... but is it all
hype, or the real deal? <br />
<br />
Perhaps you have done your "homework" so to speak, and researched
the prospective therapist and still cannot be sure. You have taken the time to
read the advertisement or advertisements carefully, clicked on the link to the
therapist's website and read every detail. You have even found and read reviews
of other people's experiences with this particular therapist. You notice that
most of them are very positive reviews, however, maybe there are one
or two really negative reviews that seem to tell a different story. Perhaps it
makes you wonder... Is it just a matter of taste? Different strokes for
different folks? Or is something else going on here?<br />
<br />
I have had several clients and fellow massage therapists share their massage
stories with me; some quite humorous and some horrific "massage gone
wrong" experiences where the client's expectations were not in the same ballpark of what happened. Over the years I have learned a
thing or two about what goes into a truly satisfying massage experience, beyond
what they teach in massage school, and have had several rather odd yet
enlightening experiences to learn from. The good news is that you can benefit
from the mistakes of others! I am ready to let you in on some wonderful secrets
on how to change your luck for the better. You really can dramatically increase
your odds of getting a great massage by following a few simple guidelines and
suggestions. I know it may sound to simple to be true, but I have broken it
down for you to the four Cs; Clarity, Communication, Courtesy and Cleanliness. <br />
<strong><o:p> </o:p></strong><br />
<strong>1. Clarity.</strong> First, before you even make that call to
schedule an appointment, be clear what you are seeking in your own mind.
Different therapists or providers have different specialties. You are going to
want to pick a therapist who has the right set of skills to match what you
need. I don't mean you need to be an expert in massage to get what you need.
What I do mean is know what you want and need. Don't assume that precisely what
you want and are seeking is exactly the same as everyone else. My experience is
that massage can meet a wide variety of needs, preferences
and expectation. Recognize that you are a unique individual. To get a truly
wonderful massage, the intention of the therapist needs to be in line with your
needs and expectations. I can't tell you how many times someone has said
something that leads me to believe they assume everyone (or at least most
people) are more or less like themselves and wants pretty much what they want.
However, I have learned that this is not really the case. <br />
<br />
My first recommendation is to check in with your body. Get some clarity
about what your body really needs. What do you feel? Are you in any pain? Do
you have sore, tight or achy muscles? Notice where you tend to carry your
stress? Perhaps you are not feeling any physical pain, but are seeking
emotional balance. You may have some mental stress you would like to release
and really need some help to get out of your head. Perhaps you are feeling
overwhelmed and your mind is racing. Perhaps what you really want and need is
to be pampered. Make mental note of what you are feeling and what you would
really like to experience. Massage means very different things to different
people. Let me share with you two examples of clients, whose needs are
completely different. <br />
<strong><o:p> </o:p></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-weight: normal; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Example number one</span></strong> is a 42 year old man who is athletic. He has been pushing himself
extra hard lately, working out at the gym and recently joined a community
baseball team. Even though he is in pretty good physical shape, he is not as
young as he used to be. It has been a long time since he played baseball.
Perhaps he did not warm up enough or stretch enough or the activity was just
outside his usual realm. Now his body is in pain, feeling the stress and strain
of this activity. What he is seeking is a deeply therapeutic massage by a well
trained massage therapist; someone who has not only been to massage school, but
perhaps has had some advanced training, ideally someone who specializes in
something like Deep Tissue Massage or Sports Massage. This client's highest
priority is finding someone who has an excellent understanding of anatomy and physiology,
knows how to recognize and tune into his body's therapeutic needs and will deliver
an awesome restorative massage. His overall goal from the massage is to put his
body back on the road to recovery so he can feel better and get back out there
and play some more baseball. <br />
<strong><o:p> </o:p></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-weight: normal; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Example number two</span></strong> is a 54 year old business man who is very touch deprived and
stressed out from his demanding job. He does not currently have anyone in his
life that fills his basic human need for touch, and perhaps is feeling a little
lonely. The idea of a nice sensual massage sounds wonderful. He is not in any
physical pain, but he is craving a relaxing and sensual touch experience. He
would like to be touched, pampered, and cared for by a woman who is perhaps
visually pleasing, warm, friendly, very attentive and eager to please. He may
not be very concerned about her formal massage training, but does want to find
someone who has a good intuitive understanding of the human body and knows what
type of touch feels good. He knows that it is important to feel safe and well
cared for. He would like to find someone who can connect with him and make him
feel special. His overall goal is to find a massage provider that he is comfortable
with, who is kind and seems to really enjoy giving sensual massage. <br />
<br />
Having a
real sense of clarity about your needs will help determine how you approach the next
step, which involves asking the right questions, the ones that will help you determine if
this provider is a good fit for your needs. <br />
<strong><o:p> </o:p></strong><br />
<strong>2. Communication.</strong> First of all, before you even call up the
therapist, I highly recommend paying close attention to the wording of the
advertisement. How the therapist describes the service she or he is offering
can be very revealing. If this therapist has a website available, I recommend
checking that out as well. What you are looking for are indications that this
person is knowledgeable and skilled at providing the service you are seeking.
You will likely still need to ask a few basic questions that will help you to
narrow down if this person is offering the specific service you are seeking.
All though there are many types of massage and bodywork available out there,
most of them fit in one of two main categories; therapeutic or sensual massage.
First you need to make sure you are talking to someone who offers the category
of massage you are most interested in. The primary intention of each type is
different. <br />
<strong><o:p> </o:p></strong><br />
<strong>A Therapeutic Massage</strong> is designed primarily as a treatment
to bring about a therapeutic benefit or change. It may or may not feel good
while it is happening. Although often times a therapeutic massage is
pleasurable, its primary focus is to address physical issues such as releasing
pain, correcting postural imbalances, or improving your physical state of well
being in some way. A good therapeutic massage will help you to feel and
function well when the massage is done or perhaps a few days later. Sometimes
people may feel a bit sore after an intense Deep Tissue Massage or Structural
Integration Session for a couple of days, but once the soreness wears off, they
often feel much better. They should notice some type of physical improvement,
particularly with regular sessions. However, a therapeutic type of massage does
not necessarily need to be painful or even particularly intense. A Circulatory
Massage is very soothing and relaxing. It involves a rhythmic medium pressure
touch, and like the name implies, it is intended to improve the functioning of
your Circulatory System. A Lymphatic Drainage Massage is a very gentle
therapeutic massage designed to “unblocking” or speeding up the normal
functioning of the Lymphatic System. A therapeutic massage may also go a long
way to relieve stress, tension and help with emotional balance. But don't worry;
you do not need to know the specific name for all the various types of
therapeutic massages or individual techniques to get the result you want. You
can leave all the specifics in the therapist’s hands. However, for the best
results, you should be able to specify to the therapist what you hope to get
out of your massage experience. For example, if you want to relieve stress,
reduce pain, or want to know if this therapist can get the knots out from
between your shoulder blades, just ask if this is something he or she can help
you with. You may also want to ask them what their specialty or favorite type
of massage is. <br />
<strong><o:p> </o:p></strong><br />
<strong>A Sensual Massage</strong> is intended primarily to provide the recipient
with a deliciously pleasurable sensory experience. There are often many
therapeutic benefits to receiving a sensual massage, particularly to our
emotional and spiritual state of being, but the main focus is on sensation. A
good sensual masseuse is a master of the senses and understands the art of
touch. Often times a sensual massage functions to transport the recipient to a
blissful, meditative, nearly trance like state of consciousness. The primary
"sense" involved is the sense of touch. However, other senses may be
incorporated as well, such as the sense of smell when essential oils are added.
The true sensual masseuse also pays close attention to the music selected and
the visual environment to create an overall positive sensory experience for the
client. <br />
<o:p> </o:p><br />
Please be aware, the word "sensual" is very often miss used when
it comes to massage. Now I am not placing any judgment here, either condemning
or condoning the alternative use, but I am just trying to clarify what you
might run into out there in reality, if you request a sensual massage. To be quite
honest, many people, both providers and recipients, have come to use the word
"Sensual" Massage, more or less, as a euphemism for an
"Erotic" Massage, or a massage with some type of sexual release
involved or "happy ending". In fact this alternative meaning has been
so widely used, that the original meaning is often obscured or lost. Just for
clarity, if you want to request a sensual massage that is non-erotic, I highly
advised that you ask specifically if this provider offers a non-erotic sensual
massage, or you might want to use different words to ask for what you are
seeking, such as a blissful relaxation massage or perhaps a massage designed to awaken the senses.
<br />
<br />
Sometimes you may notice that the advertisement is very suggestive, and strongly hints at the
real service being offered. If the masseuse is nude, provocatively posed or
very suggestively dressed in the photo, than it might be pretty safe to assume
that the erotic type of massage is what is being offered. Sometimes it seems
that the more blatantly provocative the photos, the less real massage skills the
masseuse has. However, if it is really not clear which type of massage
is being offered, I would suggest very simply and directly asking if they offer
the type massage you are seeking, and really listen to the answer. But keep it very
simple and avoid getting graphic. If you are requesting an erotic massage
session, I do NOT recommend that you ask if she or he will provide any specific
sexual acts, or get into a discussion about how much extra they would charge
you. If you try to engage them in any overt sexual talk, particularly in conjunction
with money, this will very likely result in the masseuse hanging up on you,
blocking you, stopping all communication. Please be aware that this type of
talk puts the masseuse into a compromising legal situation. Even engaging in a
conversation that involves any specific sexual act for a specific price may put
them in jeopardy of being arrested. They may suspect that you are law
enforcement trying to trick them. <br />
<o:p> </o:p><br />
You may like the picture that accompanies the advertisement, but this may
not be enough to determine that this is the therapist for you. Although I
personally think it is not ethical to misrepresent yourself, there are
providers who use pictures that are not even of themselves, or maybe very old
outdated photos from 20 years ago. If physical appearance or beauty is very
important to you, be aware that pictures are sometimes very deceiving. The
picture you see may or may not be a good representation of who you will be
meeting with. If this is important to you, then I suggest that you ask if the
picture on the advertisement is an actual up to date picture of the therapist
you will be meeting with. If you get a bad vibe at any point while talking to a
therapist, that they are not being honest with you, or don't seem to be a
comfortable fit, then pay attention to that feeling and move on to someone
else. <br />
<strong><o:p> </o:p></strong><br />
<strong>3. Courtesy.</strong> How you treat and interact with your provider
makes a huge difference in the quality of the massage you will receive.
Whenever I see a negative review of a massage therapist who I know normally
gets glowing reviews, I suspect that the client may have actually behaved in
such a way that they negatively affected the massage. Yes, they may have
actually gotten a bad massage from a therapist that normally gives wonderful
massages, because they (the client) did not behaved themselves well. As much as
I try my best to give all my clients a fantastic massage, I recognize that I am
only human. If a client is rude, insulting, demanding and grabby, or if they
cross any of my boundaries, then I will be forced into a defensive mode. I
simply cannot give a fantastic massage when I feel vulnerable or guarded.
Please be respectful and polite at all time, and I assure that you will get a
much better massage. If you are not certain about what the expectations are;
what is allowed or not allowed, then ask politely before you do anything
questionable, and then respect his or her wishes. <br />
<o:p> </o:p><br />
I have encountered some so called "hobbyists" who actually make a
sport out of trying to get a purely therapeutic massage therapist, who has
clearly stated that she does not offer any erotic services, to touch them
erotically. This so called hobbyist generally does not bring up their true
interest until after the massage has already started. They may try to steer the
massage down a sexual path in a subtle or sometimes not so subtle way. This
behavior is disastrous on several levels. I could go in to depth about how
potentially damaging this is to therapist, who may be constantly bombarded with
sexually demeaning overtures on a daily basis. I could tell you about many
potentially gifted therapists who have been discouraged and given up massage
therapy as a profession all together over this issue. I could tell you about
others who gave into to the pressure, but resented it and became bitter and
cold. But more to the point, it is just not a good strategy for you to engage
in if you want a top quality massage. You will most likely experience one of
three less than optimal possible outcomes: <br />
1. She may refuse to continue the massage altogether and send you packing on
the spot (possibly without your money). <br />
2. She may try to continue with a purely therapeutic massage, but the
quality will suffer because she will be very guarded. <br />
3. She may give in to the pressure. Even if you achieve some type of victory
by wearing her down, if her heart is not in it, I can assure you the quality
will not be good. Do you think a touch given begrudgingly, is really worth all the effort?<br />
<br />
Another behavior that can diminish the quality of your massage is trying to
haggle over the price. You may be able to politely ask if she or he is offering any specials, or ask if she or he
offers a discount perhaps to military or senior citizens if this applies to
you. But if the answer is no, you need to let it go. If you cannot afford the price asked, then I suggest moving right on to a different therapist who is already in your price range. If you continue to try to
wear her or him down, this will not work in your favor. This is very insulting. It is
extremely hard to give a good massage to someone who has just insulted you. I
strongly suggest either pay the price asked or pick a different therapist. <br />
<strong><o:p> </o:p></strong><br />
<strong>4. Cleanliness. </strong>You might think this one would be common
sense, but I can tell you from personal experience that more often than I would
like to recall, I have had a client lie down on my massage table who was not hygienically
savvy. Remember that in order for your therapist to do a good job, they are in
very close proximity with you for generally an hour or more, with their nose
all right up in your business. If you have bad breath, body odder, or dirty
stinky feet, they cannot escape it. Please put extra care into your hygiene
before getting a massage. It will pay off. It is extremely hard to do your best
work on someone who is not clean or smells bad. If you take the time to brush
your teeth, take a shower, use a little soap and deodorant, believe me, you will
get a much better massage than if you do not. If you are unable to do these
things before your massage because you are coming straight from a hot sweaty
job, then please ask the therapist if there is a shower facility available to use on
site. If the answer is yes, then bring your toiletries with you, use the shower
before you get on the massage table and don't forget to brush your teeth. <br />
<br />
Cleanliness also
applies, in the broader sense of the word, to being drug and alcohol free. If you arrive intoxicated or under the
influence of a mind altering drug, this is not acceptable. This puts both you and the therapist at risk. You are not only more likely to behave badly, but you actually are more likely to experience an injury when intoxicated. You are likely to be dehydrated and physically compromised in a variety of ways. You will have less sensory awareness and your perception will be altered affecting your ability to communicate your needs and physical limitations. This will adversely
affect your judgment and your overall massage experience. If the therapist notices your
altered state, she or he may ask you to leave. <br />
<o:p> </o:p><br />
To sum it all up; if you want to get the best possible massage, be aware
that your behavior matters a great deal. First, do your homework. There are
vastly different types of massages out there. You need to know what you really
want. Don't just look at the pictures; take the time to read the words in the
advertisement or website if one is available. Notice if what the therapist
claims to offer seems to be in line with what you are seeking. Call and ask
directly but politely if this provider offers the service you really want. If
you get a bad vibe, or are suspicious that this therapist is not being honest,
pay attention to your gut feelings and don’t go. Always be a gentleman. By all
means, please do not arrive to your appointment smelly or intoxicated. <br />
<br />
If you would like to schedule a massage with me, please take a look at my website, and then contact me for an appointment. <a href="http://www.angelstouches.com/">http://www.angelstouches.com</a><br />
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<o:p> </o:p></div>
Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-89981099589685789312012-09-18T00:16:00.000-07:002012-09-18T00:21:22.174-07:00The Tantric Art of Making Love<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-nZSO5TNexMg/UFgXSXnJVNI/AAAAAAAAACM/XFpO5hYuz1g/s1600/imagesCAZEDJJL.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-nZSO5TNexMg/UFgXSXnJVNI/AAAAAAAAACM/XFpO5hYuz1g/s1600/imagesCAZEDJJL.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Tantra has been
nicknamed "the science of ecstasy".</b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many assume that Tantra is simply the art of
sex. Tantra expands our capacity for pleasure, yet it is much more. Tantra is
about living life well and being more alive in the present moment. Tantra is the art of love. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Tantric sex</strong> is one part of a much larger spiritual practice of Tantra that touches on every aspect of life. However, it is understandable why many people are most curious about the “sexual” applications of Tantra. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sex is a very compelling force of nature. T<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>antric philosophy teaches us that everything is to be
experienced playfully, yet with awareness. There is a sense of sacredness in
every gesture, every sensory perception, and every action. The path of Tantra
appreciates all of our senses and sexual experiences as a conscious
meditation. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Sadly in today’s
fast paced society;</b> the default expectation is that our careers should be
our first priority, and that our relationships should magically just take care
of themselves. In reality this never works out well. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When the majority of our time, attention and
energies are focused on work, often times our love lives suffer by taking a
back seat. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What we sometimes forget is
that relationships need to be feed and cultivated if we want them to flourish. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Romance takes some creativity, but it is well
worth the effort. Sometimes we act as if intimacy is a luxury, or an afterthought,
but once it is gone from our relationship, we may start to recognize that it is
a real need. Even relationships that started out as solid, loving and passionate
suffer from neglect. In our minds we may be doing the whole high powered career
thing for the sake of our beloved. However, if we don’t also budget some time
for one another, the result is often a loss of intimacy. If we don’t continue
to communicate, to connect with our partner on a heart level, and to kiss each
other like we really mean it, the result is the deterioration of our
relationship and a lack of passion in our sex life. Even with the most patient and understanding of
partners, resentment may begin to silently build. Sometimes without meaning to, couples
stop taking the time to look into each other’s eyes and stop touching one
another. Before we know it, we may be living with someone who once was our
lover, but is now a stranger. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am not
suggesting that we all need to quit our jobs and make our relationship our full
time focus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, finding little ways
to keep love alive, and keep the spark in our sex lives is worthy of our
attention. Tantra gives us a structure to follow, as well as some practical tools
and techniques to bring the focus back to love and passion. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Tantra is
Transformational;</b> teaching us to be open to experience more pleasure, to connect
with the divine within us and the divine within our partner. When we apply
Tantric principles to our relationship with our beloved, we make LOVE our top
priority. We focus on heightening and prolonging that special rapport that
exists between lovers during lovemaking. We elevate love making beyond the
physical act to a spiritual experience. Through sacred love making rituals we
celebrate the union of our bodies, hearts, minds and spirits. Every act of love
represents divine union. The more we release the limitations of fear, the
deeper we can open into the consciousness of love.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The spiritual
part of tantra is to use your sexual energy to merge ecstatically with your
partner and through him or her to become one with the cosmos or god. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">A devoted student of Tantric philosophy</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> goes through an extensive program of
physical, sexual and mental exercises to heighten sensory awareness. The
tantrika, or Tantra student, will gain an in-depth understanding about the
chakras or energy centers of the body. They will learn how to open up these
centers, release block energy and move sexual kundalini energy through their
whole body. They will also learn how to connect and circulate this energy
through their lover’s body while making love. Tantra involves a slow and
thoughtful practice of lovemaking techniques. The student learns to comfortably
extend the time of lovemaking. In this way they train themselves to be more aware
of their own feelings and sensations as well as those of their partner. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">What is special about Tantric sex?</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Tantric sex is to ordinary sex what gourmet
food is to fast food. With tantric sex we relax, breath and let go of the
outside world. We expand our awareness of all our senses as we gaze into the
soul of our beloved. We tune into our beloved’s energy and celebrate our union.
We make time for lovemaking, because it is a priority; connecting intimately
with our partner, and renewing our love in the present moment. Making love
becomes a type of worship, honoring and celebrating the divine within us. The
connection is not only physical, but emotional and spiritual. We take the
luxury of time to savor every sensation. Instead of rushing or focusing on the
goal of reaching a climax, the whole experience of sensual connection is
enjoyed and expanded. The energy of sexual arousal is allowed to build slowly and
expand fully into a heightened orgasmic state of ecstasy that generally is not
reached through ordinary sex. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>By moving and
expanding our sexual energy up through all the energy centers of the body, we
may experience an intense extended state of euphoria that some refer to as a full
body orgasm. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">There is a common misconception about Tantra that
I would really like to dispel.</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Occasionally I hear people express a concern
or reluctance to explore tantra because they have heard that during tantric sex,
you are not allowed to cum. This misunderstanding naturally discourages people
from wanting to explore Tantra because it sounds potentially frustrating and
unsatisfying. Especially if you interpret this to mean you cannot have an
orgasm. The good news is, this is not the case. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, there are some </span></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Tantric techniques that
are taught and practiced among some tantrikas for enjoying sex without
ejaculating. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is some real value in
this practice, particularly in learning how to experience orgasms without
ejaculating, because this opens up some interesting sexual possibilities. If
this intrigues you, then I highly recommend giving it a try. However, these
practices are not a mandatory part of Tantric sex. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Tantra is both a spiritual practice and sexual
philosophy,</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> yet it is not a
religion or system that involves restrictions, denial or deprivation of any
kind. In fact the practice of Tantra often encourages followers to explore and dispel
taboos. Tantra is a practice of consciously saying yes to life and yes to new
experiences. There really are no rules against anything pleasurable or mutually
consensual in Tantra, especially no rules forbidding orgasms or even ejaculating.
Tantra is practiced across many cultures, and in conjunction with various
religious and cultural beliefs that sometimes get mixed up with the pure
practice of Tantra. Sex without any ejaculation at all is a practice that I believe
stems from a cultural / spiritual belief that is not purely tantric in origin,
but rather a philosophy of longevity that is practiced by some Hindus and Taoists.
There is a belief that preserving the ejaculation fluid inside your body preserves
your life force energy and therefore prolongs your life. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, this is not a belief held or
practiced by all Tantric lovers around the world. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The majority of American and European Tantric
lovers that I know do not feel compelled to practice a strict form of non-ejaculation
with tantric sex. However, prolonging arousal or postponing climax to allow the
energy to reach a higher level is often practiced as a way to expand awareness
and orgasmic bliss. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The art of prolonging pleasure without
reaching climax</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> is described in
the Kama Sutra, the Hindu sex manual written in the 4th century.
"Karezza" is the term used to define a practice of the male pleasuring
his partner and prolonging their intercourse by perpetuating his state of
orgasm without actually ejaculating. With practice, he may experience a
sensation of internal and sometimes multiple internal orgasms. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some people refer to this type of orgasm as a dry
orgasm because it happens without ejaculation. A dry orgasm is pleasurable, yet
still allows the sexual act to continue, prolonging the state of orgasmic bliss
for a couple's mutual enjoyment.</span></span><span style="color: #666666; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The art of
Karezza incorporates breath control, meditation, work with postures, and finger
pressure into the sexual act. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The Kama Sutra speaks about Karezza as a male practice;</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> however, females can also expand their
orgasmic experience in a similar fashion. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Although ejaculation control is not a female
issue of concern, many of the same basic principles of extending and expanding orgasmic
awareness through breath control, meditation, postures and touch apply to the feminine
sexual experience as well. Plus, females who previously have had difficulty achieving
an orgasm during sex, perhaps have never experienced multiple orgasms, have
never experienced internal g-spot pleasure, or female ejaculation before, can
often open up their ability to experience more pleasure and a whole variety of new
types of <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>orgasms with a little practice
and support from a patient Tantric lover. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">There are some really good Tantric techniques
for ejaculation control,</span></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> or delaying
ejaculation that you may want to explore to enhance your orgasmic experience. The
point is not to deprive you or your partner of anything, but rather to allow for
broadening your definition and experience to include more pleasure, and an expanded
view of sexuality. Experimenting with ways to prolonging love making for your
mutual pleasure is encouraged in Tantric practice. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, I personally think there is room in
the tantrika’s repertoire for an occasional quickie. However, I would like to
suggest that this not be the only option available to you, and would hope that you
would make time on a regular basis for luxurious Tantric love making sessions with
your partner. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Why Might Someone
Wish to Experience Tantra</b>? My first response would be in the form of a
question. I would ask “why not?” Perhaps it would be to explore sensuality
within a spiritual context, or to heal old sexual wounds or traumas that
inhibit your full sexual expression. Perhaps it would be to build confidence as
a lover or enhance intimacy with your beloved. One of the primary purposes of
tantra is to awaken the Kundalini; a very powerful, intense and healing form of
energy that can make us feel younger, more alive and vibrant. When kundalini is
awakened, it can travel up through the spine, releasing blocked energy,
igniting the transformational powers of each of the seven chakras. The result
is higher states of awareness, improved health and often euphoric states of
pleasure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 10pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If you are interested in learning more about tantra, or
would like to schedule a Tantric counseling session with me, please take a look at my
website: </span><a href="http://www.angelstouches.com/"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">http://www.angelstouches.com</span></a><span style="font-family: Calibri;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-72822921276761327682012-09-16T11:56:00.001-07:002012-09-16T12:02:07.025-07:00Salacious Shades of Meaning<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ys-IINtPalY/UFYfWqgD6xI/AAAAAAAAAB8/ZNEtkrbUtDw/s1600/hot-kiss-davinia-hart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ys-IINtPalY/UFYfWqgD6xI/AAAAAAAAAB8/ZNEtkrbUtDw/s320/hot-kiss-davinia-hart.jpg" width="252" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">I have been thinking about
words lately. I have noticed that sometimes we humans treat words as if
they have an intrinsic almost sacred meaning that is fixed in concrete,
when in actuality the meaning of words is much more fluid. It helps to remember
that every word that exists at one time was "made up" by us humans.
How we use words and the "meaning" of words gradually (or
sometimes rather quickly) shifts, shaped by our culture, interests, attitudes,
and beliefs. Words that describe bodily functions or anything sexual in nature
are particularly susceptible to shifts in meaning and sometimes multiple
meanings, or shades of meaning. Sometimes so
called "nice" words are corrupted and their meaning
shifts after being used as euphemisms for things we think of as not so
"nice". However, lately I have also noticed another trend. Words that
have historically had a derogatory or negative meaning are being re-claimed and
used to express something positive and strong. I kind of enjoy this trend. This
feels empowering to me. It makes me smile when I hear someone refer to
themselves, for example, as an ethical slut, a massage slut, or any kind of self
proclaimed slut, when it takes on this beautiful meaning of being enthusiastic
in their complete love, infatuation and appreciation for sex or whatever the
chosen activity. Words can be so empowering and uplifting when used in a
conscious way. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">Once while I was completely
enjoying kissing a particularly charming and delicious gentleman, he referred
to me as “salacious”. Actually I think he asked me if I knew how salacious I
was. Although he said it as if it were a compliment, I had not heard that word
used in a very long time, and never as a compliment. The associations I had to
that word were not altogether positive. This was a word I thought you might
used to describe a particularly unappealing, perverted individual; scandalous, </span><span style="font-family: "Batang","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">obscene,
lecherous, pornographic, grossly indecent, and “slutty” (which is a word I
still have mixed feelings about) is what came to my mind. He seemed to be
anxiously awaiting my response to his assessment of me. I noticed that this
triggered a bit of old insecurity in me, wondering to myself if I had been out
of line in my outward expression of pleasure and bliss, so I told him that I
wasn’t really sure what salacious meant (not an altogether untruth.) He
proceeded to say something like: Inspiring of desire, highly sensual, arousing
or appealing to sexual fantasy. Oh, I said with a sigh of relief. That sounds
like a good word. I like that! It is kind of like a mix of sexy and delicious! <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">So
this same word, with a similar yet different shade of meaning was now
experienced by me in a whole new way. The main difference being the second
definition came out of a more positive attitude about sex, than the initial
critical judgmental attitude that colored my first impression of this
word.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I made a point of using this
newly rediscovered word several times over the next few days. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">I also believe that the meaning
and power we give words can really hurt at times, in spite of the childhood
rhyme to the contrary. Adolescence years are particularly vulnerable, confusing
times for many. When I was growing up, there were many mixed messages out there
about what appropriate behavior was, particularly when it comes to our bodies, dating
and sex. There were clearly gaps between the expectations values and beliefs
passed on by my elders and what was considered cool and embraced by my peers,
but there also wasn’t really any clear consensus among my peers either, so it
seemed inevitable that no matter what I did, or people imagined that I did,
someone was not going to approve. I would be judged and I would be called names.
<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">It was particularly challenging
for me growing up as a girl. Society taught me that I should care about my
appearance, and put energy into making myself attractive and appealing, yet somehow,
as a “good girl”, I should not make myself too appealing. I should be friendly
and approachable, yet never overly forward or easy. I should look cute,
attractive, and sexy, yet not too sexy or slutty, or people might think I am a
whore. This was not an easy distinction to make at times, especially for a
teenager. I would often take an exceptionally long time to get ready to go
anywhere. Putting on makeup was tricky. Sometimes it would take several tries
of putting it on then taking it back off, because somehow I had crossed the
line from tastefully accentuating my eyes the way the magazine described, into
the realm of looking like a hooker. It was common for girls in my day to ask
each other things like, how does this outfit look? Do I look cute and sexy or
slutty and whorish? <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">My father was a minister for
awhile, during these particularly vulnerable years when I was beginning to date.
It felt as if the weight of responsibility about being careful how I dressed
and behaved because I might inadvertently “cause” a boy to “sin” was
amplified.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was given the strong
message that somehow it is up to me, as a girl, to keep the boys in line and keep
my virtue in tack. Boys, as it was explained, had “urges”. Hormones, I was
told, coursing through their veins somehow made them a little crazy and
unaccountable for their actions. Girls, however, seemed to be held very
accountable for every action and even the appearance of an action. If a boy
crossed the line, then it was just a boy being a boy, and you can’t blame a guy
for trying. If a girl crossed a line, “gave in” to a boys advances, or god
forbid, if she was so bold as to make advances, she would get a bad reputation
and be labeled with harsh words. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
message was always some version of be a good girl and some day you will get
rewarded with a husband and a family. I was told that boys may pay more
attention to the bad girls now but they do not “respect” them. They may play
around with the bad girls but when they want to get married, for some strange
reason, they suddenly want a good girl. Did it never occur to anyone back then that
healthy girls, both bad and good, had hormones coursing through their veins as
well? <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">As a girl, I was somehow supposed
to suppress my own desires and keep the boys at bay. But it was more
complicated than that. I also knew that if a girl was too guarded with her
chastity, and not willing to play around, she would get called other names.
These names were just as hurtful, if not more hurtful than the ones used for
the so called bad girls. I tried to ride that thin line between good girl and
bad girl, but it was not easy. I recall a time when I was only in seventh grade.
I had developed early, so my breasts seemed to draw a lot of attention as well
as to lead people to wild assumptions about my character and behavior.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the course of the same school day it was
not uncommon to be called a slut, a tease and a prude without doing a thing
other than to walk around with breasts. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">As a young woman, I went to a
Christian school. I remember distinctly watching a particularly disturbing film
that the faculty had us watch; sort of as a warning to us young women to guard
our virtue. Now it was the early eighties, but the film seemed to be set
perhaps in the late fifties. The story focused around a young woman who had
fallen head over heels for a young man. I can’t remember the names, but our
heroin was a very cute seemingly happy and bubbly girl, so I will call her Joy.
Joy and Mark were dating, spending a lot of time together. It seemed to be a
summer romance, with walks on the beach and rides in a convertible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>According to the story teller’s point of
view, at some point Mark began to “pressure her” for sex.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She seemed ambivalent, but did not want to
lose him, so she was struggling over what to do. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">Joy talked with a girlfriend, who
seemed to be one of the “good girls” you hear about, a Sandra Dee type. Imagine
the before version of Sandy on Greece before the makeover. That was what the
friend appeared to be like, so I will call her Sandy. Sandy advised Joy not to
do it. She told our heroine that if she went all the way with Mark, that the
young man in question would not respect her, and advised Joy to wait for
marriage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, she held out for a
while, but she must have realized at some point that she really shouldn’t be
taking advice about her sex life from her inexperienced, naive friend who
obviously had no boyfriend of her own, so she “rationalized” that since they
were “in love”, it would be all right to “go all the way” and she did. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Although they did not show us the graphic
details, it was somehow implied that they had sex. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">It seemed disturbing to me that
this character seemed to be more concerned about having sex as a way to keep
her boyfriend, rather than for the sheer bliss and pleasure of it, but this
movie was set in the fifties, apparently before women realized or dared voice out
loud, that they liked sex. Well at first everything seemed to be going swell
for Joy and Mark. They seemed to be having a great time together throughout the
summer. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">Finally the summer is almost over
and Joy is getting ready for a very special date. Joy, all smiles, confides in
Sandy that she thinks her boyfriend Mark might propose tonight. Mark was taking
her to a fancy restaurant and he had told her that there was something important
that he wanted to talk to her about. She was obviously excited as she sat
across from him at dinner all smiles, in her perfect outfit that she spent
hours picking out for this special occasion. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">However, the story takes an
unhappy turn at this point, and instead of proposing, he breaks up with her. She
is crushed! He says something lame about how they were just having a little
fun. To add insult to injury, he tells her that he is planning to marry someone
else. Someone he has been involved with for some time now, but who he was
apparently separated from for the summer. Although I can’t remember all the
details, it was implied somehow that the girl he plans to marry was still a
virgin. So I will call this mysterious fiancée Mary. Our heroine Joy comes
home, tears streaming down her face, feeling hurt, ashamed, upset, and
betrayed. You can just tell that her smug friend Sandy is dying to say “I told
you so”, but instead she just gives her one of those piteous looks that says,
“oh you poor dear miss guided slut, now that you are no longer a virgin you
will probably never land a nice man”. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">The story ends with Mark and Mary
having a lovely wedding. Joy is alone and devastated, and sadly without her
precious virginity. The story tellers paint her as someone apparently doomed to
live the rest of her life alone and in shame. I had the feeling that I was
supposed to learn a lesson from this film, but I couldn’t help but think that
the lessons I gleaned were not really the ones intended.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">I remember talking and laughing
with friends about this silly film afterwards.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The consensus among my friends was that we felt most sorry for poor
naive Mary, not so much for Joy. Yes, Joy had a bad disappointment, but she
dodged a bullet with Mark. He was an asshole!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Joy had a fun summer fling. Yes, it ended badly, but now she was free to
move on and hopefully find someone honest and loving. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Poor Mary, who seems to be in the dark about
the whole summer affair, and what kind of asshole her new husband is, is now stuck
with this cheating lying jerk “till death do them part”!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We joked about the possible future for each
of the characters. Here is my version of the rest of the story. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">Mark and Mary start a family
right away; one boy and one girl. They seem to be the perfect little family.
However, Mary started out the marriage being completely in experienced
sexually, and is still rather reserved in the bedroom. No one every taught her about
orgasms and how delightful they can be. Mark, not being a very patient or
giving man, doesn’t do much to help Mary discover the pleasures of sex for
herself. Mark grows impatient and bored with Mary, who was taught that sex was
something you should only do to make babies. Now that they have their perfect
little family, she is no longer interested in having sex. Dissatisfied with
their sex life, Mark has numerous affairs with women who seem to like sex.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mark and Mary’s marriage falls apart. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But it is the fifties and they have children,
so they stay together in this loveless marriage for the children. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">Joy, being not only sensual but intelligent,
leaves her small town and gets out into the real world. She focuses on her
career and gains a lot of respect for her work as a scientific researcher. She
begins to see that there is more to life than she was first led to believe. She
gradually becomes the confident woman that she was meant to be. She travels the
world and along the way she meets many other interesting men before she finally
settles down with a sensual French Artist named Pierre, who loves and
appreciates a woman who knows how to embrace her sensuality. He has no hang ups
about wanting a virgin bride and makes love to her enthusiastically. He loves
to paint provocative picture of Joy in the nude, and they live happily ever
after.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">Sandy’s life took some
interesting turns as well. She didn’t meet that special boy she had hoped to
right away, but being the good Catholic girl that she was, she began to wonder
if she had a special calling. Maybe she was supposed to marry Jesus. She became
a nun and lived in a convent for a few years, and taught in a catholic school.
But after awhile she noticed that it was pretty lonely being married to Jesus.
She befriended a young priest named Joseph. It was innocent at first. Doing the
Lord’s work together, sharing a pleasant conversation while feeding the
homeless, but in spite of all their vows, they began to fall in love. All of
their repressed sexual energy bubbled to the surface and they had a forbidden
love affair. Their secret was eventually discovered. It was a big shameful
scandal. They left the church, left town together and started life over in
another city. It was pretty rocky at first because neither of them had many
social life skills. Sandy, who had been a teacher at the Catholic school back
home, eventually got work as a public school teacher. Joseph, although
disillusioned with the church and the priesthood, he still felt a calling to
help people and offer comfort and guidance. He got a job at a book store, and
went back to school to become a psychologist. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">I now recognize that this film was
propaganda produced by those who wished to keep women repressed, subservient
and out of touch with their sexual feminine desires and power. Luckily, in my
case, it was not entirely successful. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">I remember thinking after viewing
this strange film that not all of us girls wanted to use our feminine wiles to
manipulate and trap a boy into marrying us someday. We actually liked being
sexual beings. When I liked someone, every impulse in my body said, “Just kiss
the boy!” Perhaps the good girls had enormous self control and virtue, but it occurs
to me that perhaps the so called good girls were simply repressed, stifled or
damaged girls, filled with shame, not in touch with their bodies or libidos.
Would they be able to magically turn back on all the repressed sexual energy they
had worked so hard to contain once they said “I do”? If in fact they did get
the good husbands, it might not be long before their marriage falls apart
because of a lack of passion, and those same good husbands would be out there
again seeking a so called bad girl. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">As a young girl, I did want to
find a good husband someday. I had all the little girl fantasies of the perfect
wedding, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>but more importantly, I also
wanted a good marriage, I pictured that marriage to be filled with passionate
love, kindness, maybe children, a nice home, and okay, I will come right out
and say it, I wanted to have great sex. I was a little unclear how I would know
if we were compatible sexually if we never had sex until the wedding night. I
never got a satisfactory answer for this one. The take in on faith line just
never rang true for me. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";">The main point of my story, if I
can pick just one, is that words are colored by our attitudes. If we have a positive
attitude about sex, our bodies and ourselves, our language reflects that. The
meaning and power of our words begins to evolve as well. When I was a little
girl, being called a slut was a pretty devastating insult. Now as an adult if
someone should call me a slut, I still might not initially jump for joy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, I think I might find a clever way of
using my words to define for myself the shade of meaning that suits me. I would
be inclined to gently correct them by saying; yes, I am a slut. I am a sacred salacious
slut. I embody the goddess, and my beloved is a god. If you would like, I could
help you to learn how to be a sacred salacious slut too. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: "Batang","serif";"><o:p>If you are interested is scheduling a session with me (or even just curious) please check out my website: <a href="http://www.angelstouches.com/">http://www.angelstouches.com</a> </o:p></span></div>
Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-8670924511365970792012-09-14T10:00:00.002-07:002012-09-18T16:13:41.316-07:00Reiki, a Return to Wholeness<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nJ0R_WO-jnk/UFOHxFTW2EI/AAAAAAAAABY/4fmQGaTjCAw/s1600/reiki_1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="173" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nJ0R_WO-jnk/UFOHxFTW2EI/AAAAAAAAABY/4fmQGaTjCAw/s200/reiki_1.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
<strong>Reiki</strong> (pronounced Ray Key) is a combination of two Japanese words rei and ki, meaning universal live force energy. Reiki is an ancient, precise system of healing that addresses physical, emotional, mental and spiritual imbalances. <br />
<br />
<strong>The Reiki practitioner</strong> functions a lot like an antenna. They draw healing ki energy from the universe through their body. This energy flows out through the palms and fingers of the practitioner's hands while they are touching the recipient's body. This energy also known as prana, mana, chi, and source, helps promote healing in all living things. <br />
<br />
<strong>Remote Healing.</strong> Reiki can also be given at a distance. The Reiki Practitioner connects with the receiver energetically. Often the practitioner uses a "proxy" to represent the receiver to help focus the energy and direct it to the recipient's energy centers. Generally the practitioner and receiver agree on a time for the healing, and the receiver relaxes while the practitioner facilitates the healing energy on their behalf. <br />
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<strong>The level of reality</strong> where Reiki operates is the underlying energy structure of matter, as the physical matter we see around us is a solidified form of energy (Remember Einstein's famous equation which says that each unit of mass is equivalent to a certain amount of energy). At the level where Reiki functions, anything can be changed because all is fluid like and is very malleable. Emotional difficulties are just as healable as physical ones since emotional issues are present in the energy structures. <br />
<br />
<strong>Healing is a return to greater wholeness.</strong> There is an Ideal form each of us has. This ideal form being the highest and clearest expression of who we are. Pain or disease comes from any deviation between the person's current form in the 3D physical world and this ideal form. Healing, then, is to bring this physical form into closer alignment with the ideal form.<br />
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<em>Reiki is also a gateway shining pure love into the universe. It is this love, which allows us to transcend our wounds and help us remember our true nature. </em><br />
<em></em><br />
<strong>What to Expect During a Reiki Healing Session.</strong> You will be asked to lay down on a massage table, couch, bed, or to sit upright in a chair. You will be fully clothed except for your shoes. You may also be asked to remove or loosen your belt so that your breathing is not restricted in any way. It is best to choose loose-fitting garments to wear on the day of your appointment. Wearing natural fabrics is best (cotton, wool, or linen). You may also be asked to remove any jewelry (rings, bracelets, pendants, etc.) prior to the session, so consider leaving these items at home.<br />
<br />
<strong>Relaxing Atmosphere.</strong> Reiki practitioners will often create a relaxing atmosphere for their Reiki sessions, setting the mood with the use of dimmed lights, meditative music, or bubbling water fountains. Some practitioners prefer to be in a place that is completely silent, without distraction of music of any kind, to conduct their Reiki sessions in.<br />
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<strong>Healing Touch.</strong> During the Reiki healing session the practitioner will place his hands lightly on different parts of your body. Some Reiki practitioners will follow a predetermined sequence of hand placements, allowing their hands to rest on each body placement for 2 to 5 minutes before moving on to the next. Empathic practitioners will freely move their hands in no particular order to the areas where they "feel" Reiki is most needed. Some Reiki practitioners do not actually touch their clients. Instead, they will hover their lifted palms a few inches above the reclined body. Either way, Reiki energies flow where they are suppose to. Reiki is a smart energy that automatically flows where the imbalances are in your body regardless of where the practitioner's hands are placed.<br />
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<strong>Phantom Hands.</strong> Because Reiki energies flow to where they are most needed there is a Reiki phenomenon called "phantom hands" that you may or may not experience. Phantom hands feel as if the Reiki practitioner's hands are touching one part of your body when they are actually elsewhere. For example, you may be able to see that the healer's hands are actually placed on your stomach, but you could swear that hands are touching your legs. Or, you may feel as if several pairs of hands are on your body at the same time as if several people are in the room with you. <br />
<br />
<strong>Reiki is traditionally taught in three levels or degrees:</strong><br />
<strong>First Degree</strong> Reiki is the basic course in Reiki. It includes four separate energy activating attunements along with complete training in the scientific use of the Reiki technique. The student is taught how to pass on the universal energy without depleting their own energy supplies. Specific instructions are given to the student as to how to apply Reiki energy to themselves, as well as to others who may wish to use it for treating a specific dis-ease or as a preventive or transformative technique.<br />
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<strong>Second Degree</strong> Reiki training can usually take place one to three months after the First Degree initiation (or when the student feels they are ready, both mentally and spiritually). During this training, the student receives two attunements and learns specific techniques for enhancing the flow of energy and for performing “distance” treatments. They are taught a special method for dealing with deep-seated emotional and mental problems, which can be used with either a physical or distance treatment. <br />
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<strong>Third Degree Reiki</strong> is traditionally referred to as the Master level of training, as those who receive this degree can then teach Reiki to others. This is an in-depth training, usually given over a period of several months, and sometimes includes supervised teaching time. Third Degree includes special energy attunements which enable the student to activate the energy in others. <br />
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<div style="text-align: left;">
If you are interested in having a Reiki session (in person or remotely). Or if you are interested in learning to facilitate Reiki, please contact me. My website is: <a href="http://www.angelstouches.com/">http://www.angelstouches.com</a> <span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
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Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5571816153336473238.post-90068167618479237342012-09-13T15:15:00.000-07:002012-10-03T18:19:50.663-07:00Have a Love Affair<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0no3CuRZ3Gc/UFJaVi1HeeI/AAAAAAAAAAY/II2MRNFFT18/s1600/Passion-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="272" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0no3CuRZ3Gc/UFJaVi1HeeI/AAAAAAAAAAY/II2MRNFFT18/s320/Passion-2.jpg" width="320" /></a>There is often an <span id="yiv732018213misspell-0">assumption</span> out there that having a love "affair" means the same thing as cheating on your partner. However, that is a very limited interpretation. People can get swept up in a passionate love affair that has nothing to do with cheating and everything to do with being completely <span id="yiv732018213misspell-0">enthralled with one another</span>. </div>
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An affair is <span id="yiv732018213misspell-1">exciting,</span> passionate and adventurous. Starring into one <span class="mark" id="misspell-0">another's</span> eyes as if your souls are entwined. Kissing and holding each other passionately as if to say, "I don't want to let you go", or "I want to soak up as much of your essence as I can... to hold me over until we can see each other again". Part of the fun may involve little secrets that just the two of you share. The <span id="yiv732018213misspell-3">excitement</span> and anticipation of planning a special <span class="mark" id="misspell-1">rondevu</span> adds to the <span id="yiv732018213misspell-2">allure</span> of an affair. The secret love notes and flirty texts that <span id="yiv732018213misspell-2">salacious</span> lovers send one another can keep your lover burning in your mind all day long.<br />
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Putting our attention and creative energy into <span id="yiv732018213misspell-1">wooing</span> one another can even magically turn a stalled relationship into a thriving affair. When making love is part of an exciting, engaging adventure that gets your heart pumping and your juices flowing, then you are having an affair. If you use this word "affair" to mean an exciting, passionate, sensually alive connection, that sweeps you off your feet and drives you to blissful distraction, then I hope we all can be so lucky... to have such a love affair. It is even possible to have a "love affair" with your husband or wife... no matter how many years you have been together, and I highly recommend it!</div>
Jeaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06973805192666416242noreply@blogger.com0